Title Page

WHAT YOU NEVER KNEW

A Novel

JESSICA HAMILTON

Dedication

For my sister Rebecca, and for Tyree, and the memories we made there.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Thank you firstly to my agent Carolyn Forde for believing that a publication would absolutely happen, for convincing me of that, and then working tirelessly until it did. Much gratitude to my editor Jenny Chen for seeing what this book could be and guiding me in all the right directions. And to Melissa Rechter and Madeline Rathle for getting me through the final stages.

To my husband Josh, you gave me a room of my own, the time and support to chase this lofty goal and I will be forever grateful for that. To my children, Luke and Ruby who are daily inspiration to do more, be more and never give up on a dream. To my older sister Rebecca, thank you for always being my biggest fan and my safest place. And to all of my friends and family whose support and encouragement never wavered along this long road of writing.

To my longtime friend Megan Bell, thank you for always being there to read and critique, I swear I would not know if something was good if you weren’t there to tell me. To my Tea with Wordsmiths writing group who kept me writing through the many times when I was ready to quit.

To my grandmother, the woman responsible for my childhood summers at the cottage. Thank you for making Tyree my most favorite place in the world and for all of the wonderful things that you were to me.

Lastly, to my mother, no matter where we ended up, nothing will ever overshadow, the support, encouragement, and belief you had in me, when it came to writing.

MAY

One hour before I died, I was sitting in a stuffy lawyer’s office dealing with the probate details of my mother’s will. It figures I was dealing with her mortality right before facing my own. Very little happened in my life that wasn’t in some way connected to her. She’d passed away seven months earlier, which meant my time of freedom from her had been brief and fleeting.

Lung cancer. It was long and drawn out, with great suffering, and cause for constant, round-the-clock care. During the months of her illness I often thought she’d finally gotten what she’d wanted all along—our undivided attention, daily displays of love, and deep concern for her well-being. She couldn’t have chosen a more suitable and satisfying exit from the world.