Back What I Carry
Chapters (30)
  1. Cover
  2. ALSO BY JENNIFER LONGO
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. Chapter One
  6. Chapter Two
  7. Chapter Three
  8. Chapter Four
  9. INTERNSHIP
  10. Chapter Five
  11. Chapter Six
  12. Chapter Seven
  13. Chapter Eight
  14. Chapter Nine
  15. Chapter Ten
  16. Chapter Eleven
  17. Chapter Twelve
  18. Chapter Thirteen
  19. Chapter Fourteen
  20. Chapter Fifteen
  21. Chapter Sixteen
  22. Chapter Seventeen
  23. Chapter Eighteen
  24. Chapter Nineteen
  25. Chapter Twenty
  26. Chapter Twenty-one
  27. Author’s Note
  28. Acknowledgments
  29. About the Author
  30. What’s next onyour reading list?

He looked so confused. “Her parents asked me to tutor her for the SAT retake because I’d helped Tiana. They’re obsessed with college. The parents, I mean. I don’t think either of the girls is—they could give a shit about the SATs, and it shows. But the parents are all, like, university legacy families or something, and they keep paying me kind of a lot, and, honestly, I need the money.”

“Oh.” Well. What do you know—tone-deaf high-pressure parents guilt-tripping their kids, who then turn around and bully nicer kids into submission with no consequences. Well done, Mom and Dad.

“I understand if you don’t want to talk about it, but can you just tell me, are you okay? Did he— What did Natan do?”

“Nothing. The usual creepy. I just got to him first.”

“You really did. I’m so sorry, but shouldn’t we have called the police?”

“I can’t.”

“Yes, we—”

“No, I can’t. Please.”

“But—”

“Sean. I don’t want to think about him anymore. I thrashed the hell out of him, and it’s over. I’m begging you.”

The rain fell harder.

“Please, come up here; it’s starting to pour.”

“I can’t.”

“Why? Wait, you saw me with Katrina at school?”

“Yes.”

“So why didn’t you say hello?”

I looked down at the porch step. It needed paint.

“Muir?”

“Please don’t tell Kira you know this. Katrina is awful to Kira. So is Tiana.”

“They…oh, man. Awful how?”

Seriously—boys. So clueless. Wasn’t I betraying Kira telling him this? But I wanted them away from her so badly, off her back for good.

“They’re mean any way they can be, and Kira does not want you to know. But I want to help her. And I didn’t say hello when I saw you and Katrina because it wasn’t my business; I told you I needed space and all that….” My hands were actually shaking. “But then I saw you and I was jealous and that isn’t fair and now I’m humiliated.”

“Please don’t be. I’m sorry, I would have told you about the tutoring, but the space…”

Fucking space.

“Katrina’s mom called me the night before I met with her, and that was the first—and last—time I tutor her.”

“No, you don’t have to stop because I’m…”

“I won’t say anything to Kira. I swear. But she’s practically my sister. I believe you. Katrina can screw off.”

“Tiana, too?”

“Tiana even more.”

I felt better. Still embarrassed, but saying it all out loud was…freeing.

“You didn’t answer my texts,” I said. “Before.”

“I was asleep, I took a bunch of Advil.”

“Why?”

He held up his right hand, bandaged and iced.

“Oh God. Is it broken?”

“Just sprained. But only because they pulled me off him too soon.”

“Sean.”