“I never said the way I treated you was okay. And, yeah, it took me too long to realize I had a problem. A serious one.” Roshan lowers his shoulders, and for the first time ever, he seems embarrassed. “But let’s not pretend you did nothing wrong.”

“I did plenty wrong,” Suhani says. “I trusted you to be a decent guy. I wasted months putting up with you.”

She savors the feel of each accusation leaving her mouth. He should have heard them years ago. But instead of ever calling him out, she kept all of it inside. This was their secret. To everyone at UCLA med school, they were the perfect couple. The perfect desi doctor couple.

The expression on his face hardens. “You know what? You show up here to what? Try and make some statement against me? Don’t stand here and act like you aren’t messed up, too. You stayed with me. You could have left earlier.”

Suhani gulps. She used to feel the same way when she’d read about women in her position. But she learned it was never that easy. Because Roshan brought her to such a low point that she often forgot she had a choice.

“Does everyone here think you’re Miss Perfect?” Roshan asks. “Or does your program director know how you just left in the middle of a rotation and took a leave of absence?”

Suhani’s voice is soft as she says, “He knows I went through something.”

“Really? In detail?” Roshan raises his eyebrows.

“Are you trying to scare me, Roshan?” Suhani challenges.

“Not at all. All I’m saying is that maybe you should take a step back before using that holier-than-thou attitude. You’ve made plenty of mistakes, too.”

What is he really doing here? Is she being paranoid? She’s taken back to the woman she used to be with him, the kind who constantly doubted herself.

“I’m well aware of that. And I came here to tell you to leave me alone and stay out of my life.” Suhani turns around and leaves.

This isn’t the way it was supposed to go today. She felt powerful whenever she envisioned this conversation. She had planned to march into his office, give him a piece of her mind, and walk away with a smug sense of satisfaction.

But now she feels all her determination dissolving and making room for something else.

Something that feels a lot like losing control.

•   •   •

The apartment is pitch-black when Suhani gets home several hours later. She hangs her purse on a gold hook and drops her keys in a speckled turquoise Anthropologie bowl on the entrance table. Since Zack isn’t here, she can get away with having a large glass of wine, cheese, and crackers for dinner.

Out of the corner of her eye, she catches a blanketed mound rising and falling on the couch.

“Natasha?” Suhani turns on the light. “You’re sleeping?”