In an instant, I was ripped away from him. Ripped away from my mum.

I was wrong about her. So, so wrong.

She never manipulated my memories. She never made me believe I’d killed her and my dad.

No, if this scene keeps playing out as I believe it will, then she’s not responsible at all.

All she ever did was love me. Love my brother. Love my dad.

A sob leaves me and I have to swipe my eyes to clear my vision as the security guard approaches my younger self. I’m bracing, already knowing what’s about to happen. Already knowing that this is the moment I’m going to be changed irrevocably and unforgivably.

“Of everyone, I feel the most compassion for you, dearest Alyssa,” the man says, trailing a finger gently down my cheekbone.

The red velvet cake I ate threatens to reappear at the tender gesture. I want to scream at him to get away from me, to leave me alone, but there’s no point—because this has already happened.

“Thanks to your dad, I know what it’s like to lose a loved one,” he whispers to me.

I feel as if I’m back in Luna Park again.

I know what it’s like to lose a loved one.

That’s what this man said to Kael and me that night. The pain in his voice, it’s the same in this memory as in real life, even if years have passed.

“What you’re about to go through,” he continues, “it’s going to hurt, it’s going to break you. But you will survive it, you will embrace it, and you will become stronger for it.” He leans in even closer. “And I need you to be stronger, Alyssa, because you’re the one no one will ever see coming. You’re my secret weapon.”

My heart stops with those words.

You’re my secret weapon.

My secret weapon.

My.

Secret.

Weapon.

My body feels so cold that my teeth are chattering around my sobs.

I am no one’s weapon, least of all this man’s.

I watch as he glances over his shoulder at my dad and says to him, “Because of you, I can never get back what I’ve lost. But I can make sure you lose it, too—and more. Everything that happens next is on you, Christopher. You have no one to blame but yourself.”