“I’d prefer it if my life didn’t depend on someone’s memory. Maybe you have hardening of the arteries and certain little memory cells aren’t receiving enough blood….”

“Johnny, for god’s sake shut up. You’re drunk and making a fool of yourself.” Diana came to his side and helped him to his feet.

“He’s not being a fool,” Rabun kindly interjected. “In his job it’s foolish to trust anyone.”

“That’s a terrible way to live. He shouldn’t have the job,” Diana hissed.

“Hold on. Hold on.” Warlock raised his hands in a strong papal gesture. “With the training I’m putting myself through I could easily kill one of the beasts with my hands. In another month of hard work two won’t be out of the question.” He slashed the air with some dread Aikido moves he had gotten out of a manual. “Why should a two hundred pound man in first-rate shape fear a hundred pound beast? And intelligence certainly helps determine the victor.”

“The chimpanzee is the only pragmatic exception,” Rabun interrupted. “I’ve done research with chimps and one weighing barely over a hundred pounds, whether male or female, could easily maul the biggest NFL linebacker.”

“No shit?” Warlock was temporarily stunned with this wonderful piece of information. It was simple to imagine Cosell announcing such a battle, and the nasalated howl when the chimp tore off the linebacker’s face. Then he sensed he was losing the argument and rose to the challenge. “Few use chimps as a substitute for guard dogs.”

“I seriously considered it,” Rabun replied. “The weather is too coarse up here and the pulmonary problems would drive one crazy. There is the additional problem that chimpanzees cannot adapt to our environment any better than Indians and blacks. Chimps take readily to smoking, drinking, drug addiction …”

“How appalling.” Diana turned on them. “You pitiful pigs. First you’re killing dogs, fighting chimpanzees, then slandering blacks and Indians. I’m going home.”

Chapter 30