“Come off it, Kirby, stop lying. If you didn’t, then who did? Of course, it was you.” Peter’s eyes narrowed in anger. He was so enraged his body was practically shaking, and when he clenched his fist like he was going to hit me, I lost my cool.

“I don’t know! Probably you did it yourself, but I didn’t fucking stick the cucumber up your ass,” I screamed, and his eyes went wide as he took a step back. Peter hated to be embarrassed. His entire life rotated around his image including in front of his family. I wasn’t letting him away with him making me out to be the asshole this time, and I took a step toward him. Lifting my hand, I gave him a hard poke in the chest.

“It’s physically impossible for me to stick a foot and-a-half-long vegetable up your asshole while you come all over my back. You need to own up to the fact that you did it to yourself, and then you fucking came on me while I was asleep when you did it. Even worse, you let me sleep like that! I was the one that woke up with the dried crust of your orgasm all over my naked ass, not the other way around. Who’s the one with the kink fetish in this scenario. Because it certainly isn’t me.” I again poked him hard in the chest. “But let me tell you, I really fucking wish I had been the one to do it because I would have made sure it didn’t feel so good for you.”

I glanced down the hall, and every member of his family was standing there with their mouth hanging open. Peter looked like he was going to faint as he followed my lead and looked down the hall. I rolled out my shoulders and straightened my spine as I marched passed the shocked group of people. Peter could try and spin that story any way he wanted to, but in the end, there was no other explanation, and I was done with him bitching at me. I mean, technically, it could’ve been someone else entirely, but it was ridiculous to think someone broke in only to mess with Peter and me like that. Then not steal anything, and not leave a trace or sign of a forced entry.

Grabbing my purse, I pushed past the group Peter was trying to explain the strange night to in as few words as possible.

“Where are you going?” Mrs. Cunningham said.

Her face was as angry as Peter’s had been a moment ago. I had no idea why everyone was mad at me. Did his mother really think I’d do something like this? If so, it certainly explained why I never connected with her.