Chapters (41)
Do I lack sweetness? I thought I might, but Gilly somehow knew I was a virgin. How? He knows I’ve been sneaking out. I’ve always been a bit rebellious, but I wanted what my parents had. Our father might not have been the best at leading our family, but he loved Mom. There was no one he was more loyal to than her. My brother is the same. I want that. As rebellious as I am, I still hold on to a few old school values, I think. My virginity is for the man who will love and adore me forever. The one who will pick me over all others.
Is that really so much to ask? Gilly would never pick me over my brother. I need to come to terms with that. Maybe tonight isn’t as bad an idea as I thought.
The girls work their magic on me and then Bianca when she finally returns. During that time, I decide that tonight I’m going to be open to possibilities. I’m not sure I want to be the head of a family, but I do know I am a part of this world, and I’m not going anywhere.
9
GILLY
This is insane.
I stare at myself in the mirror, taking a long, hard look. Even so, I still haven’t come to grips with what I did to Carina in the pantry a few days ago. And I really can’t come to terms with what’s going to happen tonight.
The staring contest has to end. If it doesn’t, I’m going to smash the shit out of my mirror and lose my goddamn mind.
I turn and take a deep breath. It should calm me. It doesn’t. I haven’t been calm from the moment Carina’s smart mouth reached my ears. She’s all I can think, all I can see. My temper is shorter than it’s ever been, and my ire is on a hair trigger.
Antonio and Butcher have noticed, too. They haven’t said anything to me, but I see their shared looks.
Fuck! I’m going off the rails. When I close my eyes, all I can see is Carina at my feet, her mouth wrapped around my cock as I thrust–No! I grit my teeth. If I think about that, I won’t be able to string a sentence together. I need my wits about me tonight.
Tonight. I take another deep breath. The house is prepped and ready to be filled with suitors, mafia men who want to make a play for a Palermo bride. It makes me sick. It’s taken every shred of control I have not to tell Antonio to call it off, to stop this fucking foolishness, to put an end to Carina’s gambit.