‘Say that again, Connor?’ she asks.

He sits up, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his sweatshirt. ‘They did it,’ he says. ‘They forced that guy into the freezer.’ He starts to cry again but his words are clear: ‘And I did nothing to stop them.’

53

Once Connor starts talking, he can’t stop.

His solicitor tries to interject, but he carries on, words falling from his mouth, unabated. He tells the detectives how he came across the three boys drinking in the bus shelter on his way home from the railway. At first he kept walking, his head down as they jeered, throwing bottles his way, feeling the glass shatter at his feet. But then he slowed.

‘Play with us, Vardy,’ one of them mocked. ‘Come on, join in.’ He paused. Although he hated these boys, the pull of belonging was too much. He’d always envied their tight gang, their in-jokes, their laughter and fun. He’d never had friends.

‘You want a drink?’

He turned. Mark Black was holding a bottle out to him. It was dark and the storm was gathering force, wind pulling at his coat. He knew he needed to get home, but what was waiting for him there? An empty fridge. Another can of watery baked beans.

He walked back to the bus shelter. At first he feared a trick, but Mark jiggled the bottle again, the vodka sloshing in the bottom. He reached forward and took it. Mark nodded.

‘Chill out, Vardy,’ he said. ‘It might do you some good.’

He took a swig, then Mark pushed the bottle up again into his mouth, forcing him to take another. The vodka was harsh but warming. The boys laughed, but in a different way, an approving way, then handed him an open can of beer.

For the next hour he sat with them. Listened to their laughing and joking as he drank can after can. It started to rain, but they were dry in the bus shelter. He took a proffered cigarette, even though he didn’t smoke, and felt himself get woozy and light-headed.

‘Truth or dare time,’ Mark said.

‘I’ll go first,’ Tyler replied. ‘Dare.’

‘Moon the next car that comes down the road.’

‘Fucking easy,’ Tyler said with disdain. He walked to the edge of the pavement, hood up against the rain, then pulled down his trousers as a car approached. The car sped past, throwing up a cascade of water as it drove through a puddle. Tyler laughed and rejoined them in the bus shelter.

‘You next, Lee.’

‘Dare.’

‘Chicken with the next one. The next car.’

Lee gave him a cocky stare. ‘As you wish.’

Connor’s heart was in his mouth as Lee stood in the middle of the road. Lit in the approaching car’s headlights, he stood squarely in front of it. A loud beep, a squeal of brakes, then Lee leapt out of the way, laughing.