“If you’re illegally parked, you’d better go. I don’t think you have much choice. Call me when you get to Boston.”

He kissed Desmond on the mouth with what felt like a mixture of love and aggression. Desmond watched him walk into a coffee place on the corner. It was going to be much more difficult to go to Boston and feel comfortably released from his relationship with Russell if he didn’t have the luxury of believing it was solid and utterly secure.

Five

Is This All Right?

1.

It was ten o’clock before Jane could convince Gerald to turn out the lights in his third-floor “apartment” and try to get some sleep. Earlier in the evening, they’d had an argument because she’d bought him a $5.99 Ace Hardware flashlight instead of the $15.99 Black & Decker version he’d requested. She’d expected there would be consequences for buying the cheaper model, but she’d vowed only two days ago that she wouldn’t let him bully her anymore and she had to start somewhere.

Looking into his darkened room, she could see the big mound of his body under his sheet, his face turned away from her. “I hope you sleep well, sweetie,” she said.

There was a sigh from the bed. “I intend to,” he said.

Gerald had a phobia about sleeping with the windows open—another symptom Dr. Rose Garitty refused to discuss with her—and the room was stifling. “Are you sure you wouldn’t like me to turn on the air conditioner?”

“I doubt that will be necessary, Jane. You know how I feel about that thing.”

“All right, sweetie. Good night.”

“Mmm hmm.”

There were moments when Jane felt that Gerald was one of the most mysterious people on the planet. She didn’t understand how he made decisions, where his strong likes and dislikes came from, how he’d developed such an adult sense of irony and outrage. Sometimes she looked at him with admiration—So independent! So intelligent!—but other times, most times, his independence was the source of free-floating anxiety. Perhaps he was picking up on some subtle, unconscious message she was sending out, and that was what kept him so aloof and inaccessible. Thomas was amused by his behavior. The casual way he laughed off Gerald’s opinionated outpourings and the ease with which he engaged him in serious discussions had created a bond between them that she envied. The one time she’d greeted Gerald’s pretensions with a lighthearted, if slightly forced, laugh, her son had looked at her with disgust, as if she were foaming at the mouth.