“Stop it,” she says, poking my arm. “It’s not funny. I think it’s real.”

Tears come to my eyes as I keep laughing.

“Wilder, I’m serious.”

I wipe at my eyes and shake my head. Once my laughter is under control, I say, “It’s not real.”

“How do you know? Did you touch it?”

“I mean, I swatted at it to see what kind of material they made it from, but if it was real, it wouldn’t have enjoyed the swat. Also, it’s not coming out of a wall. It’s suction-cupped to tile. There’s a difference.”

“You say this as if you have experience.”

I roll my eyes. “If it was real, it would be coming out of a hole, and someone would be standing on the other side. There was nothing real about it.”

“It felt real, and to my dying day, I will swear that it grew in my hands.”

“How long did you hold on to it?”

“Not that long.”

“Seems like a decent amount of time. I mean, your shower was longer than expected.”

“Stop that,” she says while snagging the envelope from me. “You know I want nothing to do with all the erotica in here.”

“Shame. You could have a lot of fun.”

“We are not here for fun, Wilder. We are here to get a job done.” She tears open the envelope and then pulls out the letter. Clearing her throat, she starts reading out loud. “‘Mr. and Mrs. Price, you are expected in cabin ten, green square, tomorrow morning at eight. Breakfast will be provided to you via room service at seven thirty, so do not be late.’”

“That’s it?” I ask.

She flips the paper over and confirms with a nod. “That’s it.”

“Hmm, I wonder what it’s going to be.”

Her lips twist to the side while she starts to think. It’s kind of cute, the way that she gets lost deep in thought, as if no one else is around.

“Oh God.” Her eyes widen.

“What?”

She turns toward me. “What if…what if all this sex stuff is a prelude to the activities we have to do? What if we have to perform our sex live?”

Expressionless, I say, “Do you really think that would happen?”

“I don’t know, Wilder. Did you expect Sanders and Ellison to come out onstage and do what I can only describe as a terrible rendition of one of the choreographed songs from High School Musical?”

I snap my finger at her. “That’s why it felt familiar. You know, I couldn’t quite place it, but yes, it had a Vanessa Hudgens, Zac Efron spark to it.”

“Seriously though, what if we have to have sex?”

“One, that’s not going to happen. Two, it’s illegal. Three, consent is a real thing. They can’t force us to do anything.”