“Seriously, Chad,” Brad says. “Don’t.”

“No, something has to be said, because they’re playing the system.” He turns to us and says, “We take this camp seriously. This is a time for us to recharge our marriage, and you’re making a mockery of it, faking your issues so you can get more attention.”

My skin prickles.

My nerves jump in fear.

And I think it’s time we leave.

The tension from the group.

Wilder’s budding anger.

This can explode and not in a good way, especially since we have no leg to stand on when it comes to being here.

Wanting to step in before things get out of hand, I say, “Maybe we should⁠—”

“You think we’re faking our issues?” Wilder says, sitting up now and completely ignoring me.

“I think you’re not being genuine.”

“Is that why you brought us over here?” he asks. “To confront us?”

“No,” Brad says from the side, his wife looking like she wants nothing to do with this. “We were playing a game, like we always do.”

“Brad, don’t lie,” Chad says. “Just this afternoon, you were complaining about them.”

They were talking about us? All of them? What exactly were they saying? Were they judging me?

“I was not,” Brad says. “I was…I was complaining about the cabin they got.” Brad’s poor wife. “Everyone was.”

Confused, I ask, “Do you not have good cabins?”

“They’re not your cabin,” Chad says.

Lucky them. What I wouldn’t give to be in a normal cabin where I don’t wake up to the sight of a scrotum staring me down.

“Is this really what this is about?” Wilder asks. “You’re jealous we got a sex cabin?”

As if they would answer that…

The guys all look around and then lightly nod their heads.

Okay, maybe I was wrong.

Either way, I wish this conversation would end. Is that marshmallow burnt yet?

“Let me get this straight. You’re jealous we have a sex cabin, so that means you can gang up on us and make us feel bad about it? Call us out on supposed lies that are simply not true? Jesus.” Wilder lifts me up off his lap, tosses his stick into the firepit, and then says, “You’re all pathetic.”

Oh boy.

The anger has peaked.

“That cabin is reserved for the most problematic couple,” Chad says. “We know what you’re doing. Sanders’s philosophy is all about having an intimate and thriving sex life while combatting communication roadblocks. It all seems too convenient. You two are not communicating and don’t even touch each other, therefore, he’s going to make sure he works on you the hardest. They’re going to get the tent.”

What the hell is the tent?

“You don’t know that,” Brad says.