She quickly shook the thought from her head. Deep down, there was nothing she would change about Nate. They were different, and it worked. Laura had often wanted to be more like him and happily throw dinner parties at a moment’s notice, or not be remotely bothered when the doorbell rang and a visitor showed up uninvited. But she wasn’t that person. She was the one who felt most content when she was controlled and organised; and efficiently running the marketing for a number of clients was something Laura thrived upon. It was why she’d felt she was leaving a part of herself behind, the day she walked out of Morris & Wood to go on maternity leave. And deep down, when she reminded herself of this, she thought how wonderful it would be to find that part again.

Despite this thought, her intermittent tingles of excitement blended with dread as she gazed at her son and told Nate she would be home early. ‘Well, early enough to give him tea, do his bath …’

Nate grinned. ‘Just do whatever you have to, on your first day. I won’t expect you until I see you.’

‘No, but I will,’ she said, looking up at him sharply. ‘I want to.’

‘That’s cool,’ he continued to smile. ‘We’ll look forward to seeing you.’

Of course he probably didn’t believe her, because she’d so rarely got home before seven in the past, but she would prove him wrong. She wasn’t about to let her job take away time with her precious family. She was confident she could make both work, despite what the mums in her NCT group had warned her.

She had brushed off their concerns when, in passing conversation, she’d told them she was returning to work. If anything, she’d wanted to slap the look of horror off Chrissie’s face. Not that she was surprised with Chrissie, who passed judgement on everything from colic to weaning, to when was the right time to stop breastfeeding. But none of them were planning to go back full-time. Even Nancy had said she would only do three days if one of them could be working from home. And certainly none of them had even considered the possibility of going back before their full twelve months were up.

Laura knew what they thought of her. That she clearly didn’t want to spend time with her son. Of course they never said as much, but she could tell that’s what they must think, by the constant hammering of questions, the persistence of wouldn’t she miss him?

Yes, she was going to miss him. What did they think: that she was a bloody robot? Her heart was tearing in two, and she hadn’t even left the house.