“Laurel, that’s not what I meant. I’ve only ever wanted the best for you.” He deflates. “I love—I loved you, Laurel. For decades. I just…” His outrage fully fades. “I just don’t understand. He’s the Prince of Velmara. The son of King Mazus. How can you trust him so easily? It took you years to tell me anything about the kingdom. You would shut down if I even mentioned the Council or your rule. And now, in just a handful of months, you’ve brought him into secret political schemes? Not only that, but you lied to me. He was at the tower that day, and it was the Velmarans who helped the rebels escape. I don’t get it. How could you trust him so easily and keep me out of your schemes?”

My temper dissipates. For the first time in years, I see Carex and understand him. My heart aches for what might have been, for his sake. His issues with Thorne make sense. The two of us certainly haven’t kept our raw lust hidden very well. If the roles were reversed and he had not only lied to me but mocked my rational assessment of a dangerous situation like I’ve done to him multiple times, I’d be incredibly hurt. Carex has patiently waited all these years, hoping I would open up to him, probably working himself up in the Council so he had a reason to be involved in running the kingdom organically.

But what he doesn’t understand, can never understand, is that our issues didn’t stem from just me. Fear of my power and the way he’s always clung to a vision of me that isn’t reality stunted us before we ever even began. He might love Laurel, but he doesn’t love the Queen of Thayaria, much less the Witch Queen, and as much as I wish I could separate the two, I will always be both.

“Carex,” I say softly. I don’t want to tell him, don’t want to take this risk. But he needs to hear it from me, before Thorne in his jealousy and male pride reveals it. More than that, Carex needs to let me go, and I need the Captain of my Royal Guard to trust the Velmarans. They’ll have to work together to stop Krantz and the rebels. Hopefully revealing the information will help him understand. “Thorne is my mate.” His eyes widen. “I know we’ve always been told they aren’t real, and it’s something I’m still figuring out myself. But it’s true.”

His shoulders slump. “Are you sure about this?”