But I’ve seen: you’re basic. You’ve had your say:

For you looks matter. Okay. Have your way.

But choose now. Which one of these will you try:

To have me old and ugly till I die

And be a dedicated, loving wife

Who will please you all the days of your life?

Or you can have me younger and pretty

But take the risk, when we’re up in the city,

That every handsome young bwoy wan kiss me,

Here, there, and places you c’yant even see!

The choice is yours: you must do as you feel.

ALVITA

And the boy thought deeply: he stressed and sighed,

Then he turned to his old wife and replied:

YOUNG MAROON

You know what? You’re my girl, my wife, my love,

You blatantly know a lot about stuff.

I’ll put myself in your hands – you decide.

Choose the best thing, or what makes you feel pride

In both of us. I’m easy. You do you.

If you’re into it, I’m, like, on board, too …

We see the OLD WIFE tying a silk scarf around his eyes, a blindfold, which seems like it might be borrowed from someone’s boudoir. She ties his hands behind his back with another silk scarf. And then changes places with ALVITA, who takes it from here, while the YOUNG MAROON becomes more obviously DARREN. We hear Chaka Khan’s ‘I’m Every Woman’ playing. The next scene between ALVITA and DARREN feels very intimate, like an erotic scene from their real life.

ALVITA

So now you agree: I am the master?

I’m in control? Not ask him but ask her?

HUSBAND DARREN

Yes, my wife, I know now that you know best.

ALVITA

Kiss me, bwoy … No more fighting, no more stress.

I swear I’ll be every woman to you:

Fit and good and smart and true.

I swear to God I’d rather die crazy

Than be anything but the best lady

Wife this world ever saw. I’ll be so good

To you, baby. And in a sec you should

See before you the fittest, finest Fly

Gal you ever seen. Beyoncé look dry

Next to me. Jourdan Dunn an old skinny

Bird next to me. I outshine Naomi.

And if you discover I tell a lie

My life is yours: I’m not afraid to die.

Now let me take this off so you can see

This make-over that has come over me!

ALVITA pulls off the blindfold to reveal her fabulous, thick, middle-aged beauteousness. And DARREN looks delighted, though some of ALVITA’s descriptions of what happens next seem almost like magical commands that impel him to act as she says he did.

ALVITA

Yes, man. When the young boy saw all of this,

How young she was and how totally fit,

He hug her up tight-tight in his big arms.

His heart was so uplifted by her charms.