I screw up my face as if there’s a rotten smell in the air. “Except for that. The thing is, not falling in love with Ella is precisely what’s helped me stay on track. I can’t imagine what would have happened if I’d been some lovesick chump finding out his fiancée had been stringing him along. I probably would have had to take a leave of absence just to get my head straight.”

That kind of scenario is more familiar to me than Solange might realize. My own mother would mope around the house for days when a boyfriend didn’t pan out. Once I hit my teens, I learned to do the cooking and cleaning until she clawed back from her latest downturn. Those were fun times.

“Your dossier mentioned one serious relationship before Ella,” she says. “What happened there?”

“Carrie Sloane,” I say. “We met on the first day of law school. Moved in together by the start of our second year.”

We stop at an intersection, and I look around me. People are meandering nearby, and I didn’t even notice. I’m focused on explaining myself. Getting it right. Because even though Solange and I don’t know each other well, I care about what she thinks of me. I’m convinced that if I don’t pass muster with her, I’m doing something wrong. Some people just affect us that way, I guess.

Once we’re clear to cross the street, she asks, “And then?”

“She complained that our relationship wasn’t growing in the way she’d hoped. I wasn’t romantic, she said. Didn’t tell her I loved her. Didn’t sweep her off her feet and all that jazz. But I was a solid boyfriend, I thought. Faithful. Supportive. And I cared for her. None of that was enough.”

Carrie wanted more than I could give her. I wish I’d figured that out before we decided to live together. It would have saved us both a lot of pain.

“Is that what ultimately led you two to end things?”

“It would have been the reason. Eventually. But before that could happen, she flunked out and expected me to move across the country with her. We were a team, she thought. And teams stick together, don’t they? Well, I couldn’t fathom giving up my law career for anyone. But I especially resented the fact that she expected me to. If we were a team, why was I the one who had to give something up? Obviously, she left without me. After that, I realized something important about myself: I’m not wired for romance. If two people are compatible, cool. That can be enough to make it work. But don’t oversell what’s happening. My mother talks about getting this warm, fuzzy feeling in her chest, and my brain immediately shuts down. I just don’t see the point.”