I had been corrupted and abused by him. Nathan’s blood in my veins and his hands on my skin eased the pain I’d felt since Cyrus had been my sire.

Nathan needed this, too, if only for the distraction. All of his thoughts were tainted by a sense of urgency. What could he focus on in the moment to keep the unfortunate realities of his past from intruding on the present? It made my head spin. I couldn’t imagine living like that every second of every day of my life.

I gripped Nathan’s shoulders as we tumbled into the same bed for different reasons. He avoided, I confronted.

“It’s been a really long time since I’ve done this,” he mumbled apologetically against my neck as his hands skimmed below my T-shirt.

His fingers raised gooseflesh on my thighs. I shivered. “You’re doing fine.”

Every inch of his body was as hard as it looked. There wasn’t a spare ounce of flesh on him, and when he pulled his shirt over his head I didn’t know where I wanted to touch first. My hands wandered restlessly over his smooth chest, his solid arms, the ridges of his abdomen.

Lying between my legs, he pushed my T-shirt up, baring my thighs, my stomach, my breasts. I pulled the shirt off and he rested his head against the curve of my stomach. When he kissed me there, I clamped my knees around his waist, my breath hitching.

With every gentle brush of his fingers, every stroke of his tongue against my flesh, he lost himself a little more in the act. His gratitude overwhelmed me.

Nathan sucked my nipple into his mouth, and I could only concentrate on his flicking tongue and the scrape of his stubble against my skin. I threaded my fingers through his hair and closed my eyes. Nathan crawled up my body, pressing kisses to my neck. “It’s the most incredible thing,” he whispered. “I can hear what you’re thinking. Where you want me to touch you. Was it like that with—”

The instant he said it, my body went cold.

He cursed. “That was probably the dumbest thing I’ve ever said.”

I wanted badly to cover myself. I was too exposed, too vulnerable. “It certainly wasn’t smart.”

“I only—” He shook his head. “You know you’re my first fledgling. This is an entirely new experience for me. I’m not used to being the one who needs information. I’m usually the answer guy.”

“I don’t know anything about being a sire, Nathan. I have no idea how it works. It’s something you’re just going to have to find out on your own.”

He rose onto his knees and it looked as though he was going to get up from the bed. His denied need throbbed painfully through my own aching body, and I reached for him. I’d never been the initiator in sexual situations. Most of the time, I’d just gone through the motions, wanting to please for the sake of approval. Now I just wanted to make him feel something other than fear or anguish. And I really wanted him.