It was late afternoon when we arrived in Dallas. Manuel carried a sleeping Lily into the house and gave her to Rosa. Mayflower embraced me, tears in her eyes. After she and Rosa had gone upstairs with Lily, I sank down into a chair. Ma had been right. I was a useless chit. I sat for a while, then dragged myself up to my room.

I pulled out my bag from under the bed and threw my belongings into it. It didn’t take long. I had acquired little in the way of clothing or other possessions. As before, I cradled my books in my arms, my tears splashing on their tattered covers, before putting them in the old satchel I had brought from home and clasping it shut. I moved about in a trance, scouring the room to make sure there was no trace of me left.

When I was finished I sat down on the bed, breathing hard. Even though I was anxious to be gone before Aidan arrived home, I allowed myself some time to mourn. How could I have been so careless? Now, I had lost everything—my grand adventure, which had just begun in this strange and wonderful new place, my growing self-confidence and sense of freedom, my lovely wee Lily and, most of all, Aidan. Whatever feelings he may have had for me were surely gone, dissolved under the weight of his anger and disappointment. The future I had dreamed of for us was also gone. It struck me then that the loss of a fantasy is a greater loss than the loss of the thing itself.

When I had composed myself, I picked up my bags. I intended to take the trolley to Dallas and get on a train there. I didn’t really care where it was going. I tried to ignore the voice whispering that I was running away. I had come so far, the voice said, from the shy, stuttering girl who had grown up believing no happiness would ever come to her, and now I was in danger of letting her inhabit me again. I set down my bags and a strange sensation overcame me. I realized it was anger. How dare Aidan O’Hanlon banish me to New York? It was none of his business where I went after I was no longer in his employ. Texas was where I wanted to be, and Texas was where I intended to stay. With that, I picked up my bags again and went down the stairs, my head held high.

Mayflower jumped up from her chair. “What’s this, child? Surely Aidan didn’t mean for you to leave tonight!”

“Maybe not, Mayflower, but the sooner I go the better. I don’t want any more confrontations with him. And, besides, it would be better for Lily. Where is she, by the way?”

“Poor little thing was exhausted. Rosa and I put her to bed.”