I looked up at him, trying not to notice the hurt in his eyes. “I’ll leave as soon as I can make arrangements.”

I could feel his eyes on me as I left the room. Out in the hallway, I caught sight of Kathleen hurrying down to the kitchen. She had been eavesdropping. I wanted to confront her, but what was the point?

For weeks after I confessed to Aidan, he hardly looked at me, and when he did, his mouth was drawn into a grim line. Kathleen grinned in my face, as if enjoying my discomfort. Mrs. Donahue looked at me with pity and sighed but said little. Her rejection of me hurt my heart. But what hurt most was the sad look on Lily’s face, and the tears that floated in her eyes each time she saw me. Aidan had most likely told her I would be leaving. It was Lily I had hurt most of all, and I would never forgive myself.

* * *

I decided to write to Da and tell him where I was. Aidan had been right; it was unforgivable of me not to have let Da and Ma know I was alive and well. Not that Ma would have cared that much, but Da had gone out of his way to arrange for me to come to New York along with Nora, and I owed him. He probably knew by now that I never arrived at the Boyles’ house. They’d have written to Father McGinty, who would have wasted no time in tormenting Da with the fact that I was the sinful girl he always knew I was.

I told Da that I had lied and said I was Nora, and that I had seen Nora drown. I did not explain why I was leaving the O’Hanlon house—only that I would be coming back to Donegal in a few weeks, and that I would wire him when I knew the exact date. It was only after I got no reply that a thought struck me. Maybe Ma had got her hands on it first and never given it to Da. I would have put nothing past her. I shrugged. It didn’t matter much; as soon as I landed in Donegal, she’d pry the truth out of me.

* * *