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Back The Things We Don't See Save as PDF
Chapters (45)
  1. TITLE PAGE
  2. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  3. PART ONE: Who is She if Not Everyone Else’s?
  4. CHAPTER 1
  5. CHAPTER 2
  6. CHAPTER 3
  7. CHAPTER 4
  8. CHAPTER 5
  9. CHAPTER 6
  10. CHAPTER 7
  11. CHAPTER 8
  12. PART TWO: Take the Bullet Out
  13. CHAPTER 9
  14. CHAPTER 10
  15. CHAPTER 11
  16. CHAPTER 12
  17. CHAPTER 13
  18. CHAPTER 14
  19. CHAPTER 15
  20. CHAPTER 16
  21. CHAPTER 17
  22. CHAPTER 18
  23. CHAPTER 19
  24. CHAPTER 20
  25. CHAPTER 21
  26. CHAPTER 22
  27. CHAPTER 23
  28. CHAPTER 24
  29. CHAPTER 25
  30. CHAPTER 26
  31. CHAPTER 27
  32. CHAPTER 28
  33. PART THREE: Orion Waves
  34. CHAPTER 29
  35. CHAPTER 30
  36. CHAPTER 31
  37. CHAPTER 32
  38. CHAPTER 33
  39. CHAPTER 34
  40. CHAPTER 35
  41. CHAPTER 36
  42. CHAPTER 37
  43. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
  44. AUTHOR INTERVIEW
  45. COPYRIGHT

‘I know.’ I don’t think he’s holding the speak button when he curses into the trees so strongly it’s loud even over the rain. His voice is broken when he swears into the radio. But he doesn’t move. He’s not finished. ‘Mona, can you hear me? Mona! If you can hear me … Christ. I’m sorry, kid. If I had known any of this was gonna happen I would have rotted in jail to keep you kids safe. I never wanted to hurt anybody. And this is what I deserve, I guess. People can hurt you, no problem, and you can take it – or at least I can. I’ve always been able to. That’s not really what hurts somebody, is it? It’s knowing that you’re responsible for hurting folk that don’t deserve it. Or people you care about. And I do care about Ellis. And damn, do you remind me of her. Roxy. And I cared about her too. And there’re things about this that feel the same but, oh God, this is worse.

‘Please, kid,’ he says miserably, ‘you gotta come out. It can’t be both of you, and you tried. Hell, Mona, you flew off the goddamn ferry to save your friend. You tried. I can’t have another one of you slip right through.’

He can.

I don’t move.

‘Please. No one’s gonna come back, kid. I leave and that’s it.’

And then it’s just us and the blackening sky and the rain, which covers all of me now and patters in my ears. No. This is not the time for me to leave. I don’t know what’s left for me out there if I go. Another failed venture. A world which has suffered more than it needed to because of my being in it. A world made worse because of me.

‘Mona!’

A flock of birds, demented, scramble from a tree.

Fifteen slow seconds pass. I count them.

‘God,’ Booker says. ‘Oh God.’ I hear the walkie-talkie sizzle back to life. ‘Chuck, I’m staying.’

The other end protests – No, wait, what do you – and then the walkie-talkie’s off.

‘Mona, if you ain’t coming back, then go to the north end.’ My ears perk up. ‘Go north, Mona. Up the incline. Can you hear me?’ North? What does that mean? ‘And take these.’ I hear something hit the ground, then the sound of his feet sliding against grit, which grows fainter and fainter until he’s gone.

And now I’m alone.

CHAPTER 34

CHAPTER 34

I don’t know how long I sit, motionless, in the crook of the tree.