SPEED DATING IN THE TWENTY-FIRST CENTURY, OR A LIST OF THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ME THAT REQUIRE A LEVEL OF URGENCY

I recycle because it makes me feel good about myself/

I take regifting seriously/ I smile when uncomfortable/

I can’t parallel park/ I keep receipts to remember

where I’ve been/ I’ve never been tested for allergies/ I

have been in love twice/ I only knew what that meant

once/ I was kissed for the first time in the Buffalo

Science Museum and began to associate affection

with artifacts/ I want to be reborn as an airport gift

shop or rest stop/ I am enchanted by the liminal/ I was

once told that nobody would ever love me because

being in my presence was like walking on thin ice/ I

forget details but remember feelings/ I think you’re

probably going to leave/ I think you’re probably going

to leave/ I think you’re probably going to leave/ And

you should know that I stay/ And you should know

that I’m capable of terrible, awful things/ And most

importantly you should know that

I’m not ashamed of my heart anymore

JOY, IN ONE ACT

I didn’t expect to confront joy

for the first time in fourteen months

from the seat of a parked car

but I also didn’t expect to be chased around

a waiting room by grief, so maybe

what I’m trying to say is that I never know

where or when certain feelings will find me,

I just know how to describe it when they do.

What I can tell you about joy

is that it has round reading glasses

and prefers Halloween to Christmas.

Drums on the steering wheel

to the classic rock station and

orders fried pickles from the Tully’s appetizer menu.

Tells me a secret and trusts me to hold it tight.

Kissed me last night under the glow of a streetlamp

and made me question why I kept it for so long

at arm’s length.

My own body a barrier, my own hands

obstructing the view.

OURS, AWAY

i haven’t done this in a while

so please forgive anything that may fall

out of my mouth when i’m touching you.

the firework show making an open field of my chest.

your face, the spark.

later i’ll shower in the light of a tangerine candle,

the shadow flames flickering against curtain

akin to your tongue on the inside of my thigh.

it’s been a long time since i’ve felt present in this

body.

i wipe steam away from the mirror

and fixate on the hand stretched in front of me

like a beacon. it’s shaking. i haven’t completely

forgotten how to want something this badly.

excuse all the delicate pageantry, the melodrama,

how i sighed loudly into your chest when we had

to say goodbye.

you make me want to believe in love again.