‘Petronella! But I only use it for paperwork. Willow had a ballet exam this morning.’ Nella shoved a box of Prosecco at her daughter. ‘You couldn’t miss it, could you, sausage? Honestly, she’s like Darcey Bussell.’

Willow smiled and wandered off towards the campfire with the wine, displaying the same long legs as her mother, just a little paler in the shadowed wood.

‘And we were meant to be bringing Lola Vermaak, but she’s had a little’ – Nella grimaced – ‘an episode. Her eating’s a bit of an – issue.’

‘Well, none of us will be Darceys if we eat these.’ Rebekah with a K laughed like a drain again, collecting an astonishing array of Tupperware boxes from the boot. ‘Some sin for us grownies!’ Winking, she pulled back a lid, revealing chocolate brownies. ‘Little bit of what you fancy, eh?’

Grownies?

‘Yum!’ I envisaged my own sad offering: some curling service station sandwiches, cheap sausage rolls, and a bag of limp carrot sticks with humus, all purchased somewhere along the A23 this morning.

I’d spent most of yesterday afternoon cooking a creamy smoked salmon quiche, particularly – much as I despised myself for it – to impress Nella, but I’d fallen asleep over my tax spreadsheet as it cooled, whereupon Zach, on the prowl from his PlayStation, promptly devoured it in one go.

At least it hadn’t been a Subway or a Pot Noodle, I’d reasoned, trying to keep my temper on finding the empty tin. But standing here in Nella’s shadow, the story seemed akin to ‘the dog ate my homework’.

‘These look amazing.’ I gazed at the glossy chocolate brownies.

‘Nigella, I think. Or maybe Delia. She’s the best, isn’t she?’

‘Now, where’s Beau? Beau-uuu!’ Hands on hips in her khaki cargo top, like Jane searching for Tarzan, Nella called. ‘Let’s introduce these kids!’

I felt tired just looking at Nella. But then I felt tired looking at anyone these days, my favourite fantasy being a week of uninterrupted sleep in a white hotel room with drifty muslin curtains, the sound of fountains and happy children playing in cobbled courtyards floating up.

‘Not sure where mine is actually.’ I glanced into the forest. ‘Exploring, I think, with Cecilia.’

Nella looked blank. ‘Who?’

‘Rex and Melissa’s daughter? Ceci and Zach are bosom buddies.’

‘Oh yes of course! I know they’ll hit it off straight away, Willow and your son.’ Nella clapped her hands excitedly as a huge stick thrashing through the undergrowth heralded her son. ‘Ah, Beau – good boy!’

‘I’m sure they will,’ I lied, wishing Melissa would hurry up. ‘Hello, Beau, how are you?’ I hadn’t seen him since the dreadful night with the dill jus, the furious waitress and the fox.

‘Good, thank you.’ He was an ethereal-looking child close up – serious little pixie face, hitting the bush beside him lightly with his stick.

‘Beau, stop now, darling,’ Nella said half-heartedly, catching my eye.

The boy ignored his mother.

‘Having fun?’ I asked.