‘What?’ I was beyond confused now. ‘Ceci?’

‘No way!’ Zach cried. ‘Are you mad?’

‘Hang on, what do you mean, inappropriate?’ I could see the panic in my son’s eyes, the disbelief as he pushed away from me. ‘You mean, like—’

‘Sexually.’ Her voice was a monotone. ‘Touching Cecilia in a way that was uninvited.’

‘No way!’ Zach stood up and then sat again. ‘I didn’t do anything bad – I swear down—’

‘Just keep calm, lovie.’ Tears spiked in my own eyes as I put my arm around him. ‘Let’s hear what – what else the police lady has to say.’

But I could feel terror pattering around inside me, my hands shaking badly as my fingers clutched the arm of his sweatshirt.

‘I never did anything.’ He began to cry now, properly, tears rolling fat and shiny down his face. ‘I swear on Dad’s life.’

His words pierced something in me, and I looked at him again, searching his face and, in that moment, I believed him.

‘I’d never touch a girl if she didn’t want me to.’

‘So tell me what did happen?’ I had to swallow hard to get the sentence out.

‘Yes, Zach, please tell us.’ PC Okoye looked at him. ‘Tell us in your own words.’

‘I just – I kissed Ceci.’ He was sobbing now – it was hard to understand him.

‘Zachy. Breathe!’

He breathed. ‘We kissed each other. That’s all.’

The woman was very calm. ‘Zach, you kissed her – and you thought that was what she wanted?’

‘Yes. I mean, we were – me and Ces—’

‘Ces is Cecilia Whitaker?’

‘Yes, Cecilia. Ceci. We were, you know, it was both of us last night.’

I could feel his mortification, like hot tar in the air.

‘Like, both – I mean, like – she…’ He stared past his knees, at the floor, almost doubled over.

‘Yes?’

The look on his face said: Please don’t make me go on. Not here. This is so embarrassing; I am dying inside. Please.

I pressed his arm gently. ‘Zach. You have to tell us.’

‘I know she… liked it. I know she did. It was her who— She kissed me, honestly.’ He looked up, a bit defiant now. ‘It was her that started it.’

That look: a mixture of terror, irritation and – maybe – little boy pride.

‘OK.’ The officer made a note on her pad. ‘Go on.’

‘That was it. Mrs Jackson found us in her room.’

‘In her bedroom, Zach?’ I interjected. ‘You were in Nella’s bedroom? Oh God – honestly!’

‘What?’ He looked surprised.

‘That was daft, no? To go and kiss someone, in your hosts’ own bedroom. You were asking for trouble.’

‘I wasn’t— Well, maybe. We weren’t thinking, maybe. We were all on the roof – and then – it’s just where we ended up. It was all fine, honestly.’ He looked at me, his eyes bewildered, huge. And they reminded me with a lancing pain of the day Jonny died. ‘We went back downstairs and then we just, you know, like chilled with the others. Vibing. Then Willow’s dad said I could stay the night, we all could, and I just – I went to sleep, Mum.’