I was seized by the wild anxiety of a man who brings home a puppy because it looks so sweet, then realizes that on the sixth floor he has problems. No need to panic. My apartment was spartan, but my way of life hygienic.

“Well,” I teased. “There are several alternatives. You can pop downstairs and try to persuade Lenia to open up the laundry after hours. Or you can run along the street to the big public convenience—but don’t forget to take your copper to get in because six flights is a long way to come back for it—”

“I suppose,” snapped Sosia haughtily, “you and your men friends pee off the balcony?”

I looked shocked. I was, mildly. “Don’t you know there are laws against that?”

“I had not imagined,” sneered Sosia, “you would worry about the public nuisance laws!” She was getting the measure of the establishment I ran. She had already got the measure of me.

I crooked my finger. She followed me back into the bedroom where I introduced her to the arrangements which I modestly used myself.

“Thank you,” she said.

“Don’t mention it,” I returned.

I peed off the balcony just to prove my independence.

This time when she came back I was brooding. I seemed to be struggling more than usual with the background to this kidnap. I could not decide whether I had missed the point, or whether in fact I knew all there was to know. I wondered if the senator she belonged to was politically active. Sosia might have been snatched to influence his vote. Oh gods, surely not! She was far too beautiful. There must be more involved than that.

“Are you taking me home?”

“Too late. Too risky. I’m too drunk.” I turned away, wandered across the bedroom and collapsed onto my bed. She stood in the doorway like a leftover fishbone.

“Where am I going to sleep?”

I was almost as drunk as Petronius. I was lying flat on my back, nursing my notebooks. I was incapable of anything more than feeble gestures and silliness.

“Against my heart, little goddess!” I exclaimed, then flung my arms wide, very carefully, one at a time.

She was frightened.

“All right!” she retorted. She was a stalwart little piece.

I grinned at her weakly, then flopped back into my previous position. I was pretty frightened myself.

I was right though. It was too great a risk to step out of doors with anyone so precious. Not after nightfall. Not in Rome. Not through those pitch-black streets full of burglars and buggery. She was safer with me.

Was she safe? somebody asked me afterwards. I avoided answering. To this day I don’t know, really, whether Sosia Camillina was safe with me that night or not.

To Sosia I said gruffly, “Guests take the reading couch. Blankets in the wooden box.”