Tears welled in her eyes. Rafi never spoke up, always giving Virginia a pass knowing how much she’d suffered losing her firstborn son, allowing her to wear the grief loudly while he suffered in silence. “Now go on. But please be careful and bring our girl home.”

“I will,” Becca promised, turning away, desperate to escape the confines of this house, her mother’s judgment, and her nagging worry that she was never meant to be a mother.

BECCA

BECCA

I’ve always said searching for an addict is like searching for a World War Two submarine. When they go underwater, you’re never going to find them. Eventually though, they have to come back up for air,” Christian said as he navigated the unmarked sedan down the steep incline of Coronado and into the strange middle ground that ran between Silver Lake and Echo Park, yet somehow belonged to both.

“We have got to work on your pep talks,” Becca said with a withering glare. He was always the less optimistic of the two of them, and she was annoyed to see that hadn’t changed. When they first began dating, this particular personality trait caused numerous fights. “I’m just telling it like it is,” he often said. Becca insisted that “telling it like it is” usually made you an asshole, not a pragmatist.

Christian shook his head. “I’m trying, Becca. I really am.” She could see he was trying, Ease up, Becca. He’s not the enemy.

“You have to remember Ash isn’t Robbie,” Christian said.

Becca startled at the mention of her brother’s name. “What does Robbie have to do with any of this?”

“I know how you are, always anticipating worst-case scenarios, expecting every situation will end the way Robbie’s ended. And I know it was…”

“You don’t know anything,” Becca interrupted. That wasn’t true though. Christian knew exactly what she was thinking. Of course Robbie’s death affected how Becca saw the world. No one would’ve believed Becca’s brother, an outgoing sophomore at Stanford University, would be capable of hurting anyone, or taking his own life, but that’s what happened. Some days Becca still didn’t believe that it was almost twenty years since he died. The raw ache and blame she felt over losing her brother never faded, and the thought that Ash would suffer the same fate… No. She couldn’t think about that.

“Can we please not discuss Robbie right now?” Becca said, sinking back into her seat. Christian opened his mouth to say something just as Becca’s phone began to ring. She reached into her purse, praying Ash was calling to say she was sorry and that this whole thing this was a stupid mistake.

Becca’s heart sank when she saw Nina’s number flashing across the caller ID. She couldn’t leave her hanging. “Nina,” Becca said.