Joy trains her gaze on the ceiling, exhaling into a horrible-sounding sigh. She closes her eyes and focuses on her breathing before turning back to him. He looks concerned but patient. “Why haven’t you told me about Summer before now?”

“I don’t know.” Malcolm shrugs like it’s nothing. “We met on this forum called Jilted Hearts. It’s full of people with failed engagement stories. She planned a local meetup for a bunch of us, but we were the only two who showed up.”

Malcolm doesn’t even glance at Joy while he tells the rest of his story. His eyes are unfocused and lost in a memory. She takes in his wistful, effortless smile. His relaxed posture. The awestruck cadence of his words as he talks about Summer and the past two months he’s spent getting to know her.

Joy has never heard him talk about her like that. Never seen him go soft when people ask how they met, how they managed to stay friends for so long. Joy always faithfully by his side because that’s her spot, pathetically hoping that someday he’ll see she’s right there.

And then, it’s like Malcolm suddenly remembers she is there, locking her in his sights again. “I just wanted to find someone to talk to who would understand what I’ve been through, and there she was. I’m convinced we could be more. I think that’s why I’ve been waiting for the perfect moment to introduce you. This weekend is it.”

Two

Joy storms through her front door and throws her purse on the counter, but carefully hangs up her keys on their hook because misplacing them would truly break her. With no choice left but to die alone, she flings herself facedown onto her sofa—and screams into the couch cushions as long and as loud as she can.

A heavy loaf with four paws lands in the middle of her back and immediately begins to make biscuits. Rolling over carefully, Joy scoops up her cat, Pepper, into her arms. “Not on Mommy’s suit jacket. It was expensive.” She hasn’t quite lost the will to live, and to care about fashion, just yet.

While Pepper heads to purr-town, happy to have her human home, Joy stares at the ceiling. At times, falling, and then staying, in love with Malcolm felt like the biggest mistake of her life. Awareness is supposed to be the key to healing and getting over him. But no, her feelings stalk her like some unspeakable deep-sea horror. Every time she thinks she’s free, its lovesick tentacles wrap around her, dragging her back into the depths of the Struggling Sea. Every time she thinks that maybe, just maybe, Malcolm has fallen in love with her too, he chooses someone else.

A cheery chorus of bells sounds from her phone. Right on time. Her sister Grace video calls every night to check in.