Chapters (73)
‘Sam? How are you holding up?’ I swung around to see Smithy striding towards me. Before I’d even had the chance to put the coffee down he’d enveloped me in a big hug. I had to gulp hard to stop the tears from bursting out as one-handed I gripped him fiercely around his waist. He stepped back before sitting on top of the desk. ‘You feeling any better now?’
‘Not really, I could do with a stiff drink.’
‘I’m not surprised. That is the damnedest thing I’ve ever seen in my life. You must have balls of steel to stand there and take down a charging bloody elephant.’
I didn’t feel like I had anything of steel right now. In fact, my innards had the consistency of underdone custard. And they developed a viscosity more like water when I recognised the next set of footsteps storming towards the room. Oh God, not now.
DI Johns stopped in the doorway, targeted his sights on me, then braced his hands against the doorframe. ‘What the hell did you think you were doing?’ he bellowed. Every head in the room jolted around and a charged silence descended. His cheeks puffed out several times before he found the words to continue his tirade. ‘Why did you have to kill the frigging elephant? Don’t you realise how bad that makes us look? Jesus, you have got a lot to answer for, young lady.’
I dropped my head and focused on breathing and keeping the bile down that threatened to join an old food stain on the carpet. He couldn’t do this to me, not now.
‘Well, come on, then.’ He banged his fist against the doorjamb, jerking my eyes back up. ‘Answer me. How the hell are we supposed to clean up after this bloody great cock-up? What are you? Fucking stupid or something?’
That was one step too far. The dam that fought to hold back all my anger and grief failed, threatening to overwhelm me and anyone else in the flood path.
‘I did what I had to do.’ I spat out each word. ‘How bad do you think it would have made the police look if it had rolled another van and killed more people? She was going berserk. I had no other choice.’ I made no attempt to modulate my voice. I yelled back and I didn’t give a flying fuck who heard me. ‘It wasn’t like I could just walk up and stick a bloody halter on her. It was a bit beyond leading her away to a nice safe area out of everybody’s way. Of course I had to bloody well shoot her.’