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Chapters (73)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Also by Anita Frank
  4. Note to Readers
  5. Dedication
  6. Part One
  7. Chapter One
  8. Chapter Two
  9. Chapter Three
  10. Chapter Four
  11. Chapter Five
  12. Chapter Six
  13. Chapter Seven
  14. Chapter Eight
  15. Chapter Nine
  16. Chapter Ten
  17. Chapter Eleven
  18. Chapter Twelve
  19. Chapter Thirteen
  20. Chapter Fourteen
  21. Chapter Fifteen
  22. Chapter Sixteen
  23. Chapter Seventeen
  24. Chapter Eighteen
  25. Chapter Nineteen
  26. Chapter Twenty
  27. Chapter Twenty-One
  28. Chapter Twenty-Two
  29. Chapter Twenty-Three
  30. Chapter Twenty-Four
  31. Chapter Twenty-Five
  32. Chapter Twenty-Six
  33. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  34. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  35. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  36. Chapter Thirty
  37. Chapter Thirty-One
  38. Chapter Thirty-Two
  39. Chapter Thirty-Three
  40. Chapter Thirty-Four
  41. Chapter Thirty-Five
  42. Chapter Thirty-Six
  43. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  44. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  45. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  46. Chapter Forty
  47. Part Two
  48. Chapter Forty-One
  49. Chapter Forty-Two
  50. Chapter Forty-Three
  51. Chapter Forty-Four
  52. Chapter Forty-Five
  53. Chapter Forty-Six
  54. Chapter Forty-Seven
  55. Chapter Forty-Eight
  56. Chapter Forty-Nine
  57. Chapter Fifty
  58. Chapter Fifty-One
  59. Chapter Fifty-Two
  60. Chapter Fifty-Three
  61. Chapter Fifty-Four
  62. Chapter Fifty-Five
  63. Chapter Fifty-Six
  64. Chapter Fifty-Seven
  65. Chapter Fifty-Eight
  66. Chapter Fifty-Nine
  67. Chapter Sixty
  68. Acknowledgements
  69. Extract
  70. Chapter One
  71. Chapter Two
  72. Chapter Three
  73. About the Publisher

Jack is not enjoying the fete. Gwen has committed to the opening stint on the jam stall and at first he thinks he will stay with her, but as the marquee becomes packed with plump farmers’ wives and young children overflowing with reckless energy, he makes his excuses and ducks out. The grounds are filling up now. The domed roofs of cars cobble the front meadow and abandoned push bikes decorate the iron railings, while the Hall looms in the background, disapproving of the hoi polloi now milling over its manicured lawns.

It is unbearably hot. He pulls his handkerchief from his pocket and dabs at his forehead. He yearns to strip off his jacket and roll up his sleeves, but he notices a decorous standard is being maintained amongst the crowd, with everyone suffering the heat in their hats and suits, and he has no intention of letting the side down. So, his jacket remains on, though his body leaks through his shirt into its seams.

He passes the coconut shy where a group of giggling girls are trying their luck with little success, and then an apple-bobbing barrel with a line of boys egging each other on to get wet, much to the consternation of the stallholder. The enticing scent of honey and hops emanates from the open-fronted beer tent, but though sorely tempted, Jack decides against joining the old men and lithe lads lingering around its guy ropes supping their nectar-filled glasses. He walks on.

An eight-piece ensemble is playing on a raised dais erected in the middle of the lawn, and as the violins’ soft strains float through the air Jack is struck by how unimaginable he would have found his present situation a few weeks ago. He thinks back to that night in June, huddled against the shuddering boards of the coal wagon, with his throbbing knuckles and smarting eyes, and he remembers the plan he managed to extricate from his racing thoughts. He marvels how that very plan – formed from a desire to redeem himself – has so unexpectedly brought him here to this new life – a life that he now longs to pursue.

But he knows it is an impossible dream. He must fulfil his original intentions. He has no choice in the matter – he must escape to the war that draws ever closer. It remains the only way he can atone for what he has done – and perhaps secure a future. War will be his trial and fate his hanging judge. If he is to sacrifice his life for his crimes at least it will be on his own terms, and that way he can accept its loss – for its loss, he suspects, is inevitable. The black-bordered photographs on his mantel at home reveal how battlefield odds play out for men like him.