SIMMONDS: You’re obliged to contribute to the upkeep of your daughter, Carter.

KENNY: [indignant] Come off it. She’s leavin’ me. Why should I pay? Her mother’s filthy rich.

SIMMONDS: You’re obliged to pay for the upkeep of your daughter, Carter.

KENNY: [outraged] But she’s walkin’ out on me!

SIMMONDS: You beat her up! She’s got a medical certificate!

KENNY: [exasperated] Christ! What’s the bloody world comin’ to?! In the old days, if a man didn’t give his wife a thrashing every week or so, she wouldn’t respect him. Nowadays, you give ’em a love pat and they shoot through on you.

SIMMONDS: [to FIONA] I’m sorry I lost my temper with your sister, Mrs Carter.

FIONA: [embarrassed] You did make her quite upset.

SIMMONDS: Yes. I’m a man of strong convictions, I’m afraid.

FIONA: I don’t really think there was any need to speak to her like that.

SIMMONDS: Don’t you think there’s a place for a little bit of honesty in the world, Mrs Carter?

FIONA: Yes, but if you saw her husband, Ralph, you might understand.

FIONA grins at KENNY, but he is in no mood to respond to their long-standing private joke. She realises the valuable aspects of her relationship with KENNY are no longer available to her and feels vulnerable.

SIMMONDS: I’ll still help you move that furniture into the flat if you’d like me to, Mrs Carter.

KENNY glares at SIMMONDS. He knows what SIMMONDS is about. SIMMONDS knows that KENNY knows and is enjoying FIONA’s confusion and KENNY’s anger.

FIONA: Well… er… [Looking at KENNY] Look, don’t bother, Sergeant. It should be all right.

SIMMONDS: Is your flat on the ground floor, Mrs Carter?

FIONA: No, it’s a first floor flat.

SIMMONDS: Yes, well, you’ll need another man. Won’t you?

KENNY: Lay off her, copper.

SIMMONDS: You’ll have to get used to the fact that your wife will need assistance from other men from time to time, Carter.

KENNY: [to FIONA, flaring] You think this’s going to be one great big ball, don’t you? You’re in for a bloody great shock. One in every three men is a premature ejaculator. Did you sister ever tell you that? One in three’s got a bloody weak back. You ask her! You’ve been dying to try it all out for years, haven’t you? Well, don’t come crawlin’ back to me. That’s all I’m sayin’. Don’t come crawlin’ back to me!

FIONA: [flaring] For God’s sake! The thing I’m looking forward to most is a rest!

ROSS and the REMOVALIST enter again.

REMOVALIST: What’s next?

FIONA: [still shaken] If you could take the cupboard in the baby’s room, that would just about be it.

The REMOVALIST nods. He and ROSS move off. KATE enters, still furious.

KATE: [to FIONA] The taxi’s arrived, Fiona. Do you want to come with me?

FIONA: [confused] Where to?

KATE: To the flat.

SIMMONDS: [to KATE] You can go home, Mrs Mason. I’ll help Mrs Carter and the removalist.

KATE: [through clenched teeth] Oh, no you won’t. You won’t go near that flat tonight or any other night. For all your moralising, you’re nothing but a pervert, Sergeant. I know your type. I saw the look on your face when you were fondling Fiona’s thigh down at the station.