‘Jesus.’ I press my hand against my chest, feeling my heart thudding frantically beneath my thin flannel shirt. Leaning down, I examine the bundle of blood and gore, deducing from the ragged feathers and remains of a beak that it was once a bird. Nausea washes over me, and I have to swallow back the saliva that fills my mouth. Don’t puke, Emily. I hold my hand over my mouth, anxiously peering up the drive and out onto the road to see if someone is loitering. The road is empty, and there is a chirrupy purr as Lola saunters around the corner looking very pleased with herself. She sits next to the mangled mess and starts to wash.

‘Lola, you naughty thing.’ My heart rate slows to its usual rate as I realize it’s nothing sinister, just the cat acting on her instincts. I scoop up the bird between two pieces of cardboard and throw it in the bin, stopping to pick up Lola on my way back into the house. ‘You gave me a fright.’ The cat yawns and struggles against my shoulder so I set her down and she pads off on silent paws and heads to her bed in the living room.

I work solidly for hours, lugging the heavy boxes of plants down the side path into the garden, weeding and hacking at the bushes until everything starts to resemble more of a garden than a jungle. I sing along to a Spotify playlist as I work, old songs that remind me of my mum, when it was just the two of us. Before husband number two, then three, four, five… you get the picture. I leave one headphone dangling loose, so I am not completely cut off – I still feel a little jumpy, and to have my hearing blocked completely makes me feel vulnerable – but I still jump and utter a sharp shriek, dropping a trowel on my toes as I glimpse movement out the corner of my eye.

‘What on earth are you doing?’ Sadie appears, immaculate in a silk jumpsuit and jacket, completely inappropriate for the damp winter chill. ‘I tried the front door, but no one answered so I let myself in the side gate. I hope that’s OK.’

‘Of course. Sorry, I had these in.’ I gesture to the headphones and get to my feet, my knees creaking from being stuck in one position all morning. ‘I’m just sorting the garden out. I thought it might be nice to get it ready in time for the spring.’

‘You could get a gardener to do that.’ Sadie eyes my muddy leggings distastefully and I feel a hot flush working its way to my cheeks.