Tears burned at the corners of her eyes again, and she could feel her lip start to quiver like a little kid’s. Gah. Stop. But the internal commands were useless. Tears leaked out. “Dammit.”

“KC.” Worry filled his face as hers crumpled. “What is it? Are you sad for the owls? I mean, maybe it is PMS then, because even though you’re an animal lover, you—”

“No. What if I’m a barn owl?” The words came out sharp, scratching against her throat and cutting Ash off.

Ash’s brows scrunched together, his arms lowering to his sides. “What?”

Her fingers pressed hard against the table. “What if I’m a barn owl? I mated for life, and my partner died, and now no matter what, I’m destined to be alone until I die from the heartbreak.”

The dark fear she’d been afraid to speak aloud launched out of her and hung in the air between them like a fog.

“Jesus, KC. Don’t do that.” Ash grabbed a kitchen towel off the counter and came closer. He crouched in front of her and lifted the towel, wiping away her tears with gentle strokes. “What are you trying to do to yourself, thinking tragic shit like that?”

“I don’t know,” she said miserably.

He set the towel aside and looked up at her, waiting.

She tried to find the words. “I guess because tonight I had this great date with this great guy, and I have no doubt that he’d make an amazing boyfriend or husband. He’d be loving and loyal and sweet. He’s handsome and smart. He has fantastic hair. I mean, really good and thick. Our kids would be adorable. He owns his own business. Hell, his sister-in-law is one of my best friends. He’s, like, the definition of perfect. I couldn’t draw him up any better.”

Ash’s mouth flattened, but he didn’t say anything.

“But I just couldn’t…feel it,” she said in defeat. “I tried to imagine myself with him, imagined giving it a real chance beyond just a hookup, and I just felt…hollow. Like I was acting out some role in a play. Like no matter what I do, no matter how great the guy is, I’ll never actually be able to touch that thing called ‘being in love’ again. Graham took it with him. It’s like I’ve lost the receptor for it. Like that part of me is dead.” Her eyes burned from the hard crying. “So maybe I’m a barn owl.”

Ash stared at her, empathy there in his eyes, and then put his hands on her knees. “You are not a barn owl.”

She looked away. “You don’t know that.”

He was quiet for a moment and then said, “Have you ever considered that maybe you didn’t get that feeling tonight because Marco just isn’t the right guy for you?”

“But—”

“I don’t care what he looks like on paper. Or that he has great hair. Or that he’s a damn doctor. Whatever it is that makes him supposedly ideal in your head is just a list. If you made a list of Melanie’s qualities, she would’ve looked perfect for me, but you know how that worked out,” he said. “You aren’t a barn owl. None of us are. The soul-mate thing is bullshit, Kincaid. It’s a tale of romanticism that movies and writers sell us. There’s not one person in the world for you. How fucked up would it be that you only get one shot? There are all kinds of possibilities and people who could make you happy. But if you convince yourself that no one will ever be as good as Graham, you’ll create that destiny. Of course you could fall in love again.”