‘I know that what I’m saying sounds stupid, wrongheaded, but I’m trying to be honest with you. As I saw it, the best thing I could do was to stay here and do what everyone asked. So, in the days after Leo’s death, I concentrated on staying out of trouble. I remember when your father found out about you and Tess being in the shed with the boys, he decided he didn’t want you palling around with her any more. He’d been chuntering on about the poor girl for ages. She was a bad influence, he said. I’d always disagreed. But after that … I decided I’d have to give in.’

‘You do know that Ginny was flattened by what you did? Tess said it upset her for years afterwards.’

‘I’m very sorry about that. They both deserved better.’

‘What I’ll never get,’ said Nina, ‘is how you’ve managed to keep everything to yourself ever since. You’ve had endless opportunities to confess. Instead you stayed quiet and got on with your life. I mean, did you not feel guilty? Father Galvin had a family who loved him. According to Conor, they still mourn him.’

Her mother made a gesture with her hands, like she was sweeping this aside. ‘I loved him too,’ she said. ‘Don’t forget that.’

Nina slumped forward again and fixed her gaze to the floor. It occurred to her that this would be easier if her mother displayed a sudden flash of evil. If she revealed a cloven hoof. If there was a stench of sulphur. But in her navy trousers and baby-blue sweater, a silver chain at her neck, she looked the same as ever. She sounded the same. Admittedly, there was something impenetrable about her, but that had always been the case.

Although Nina was angry, she didn’t have the right phrases, or the energy, to express her rage. She felt drained. Scared. Most of all, she felt a dark, bottomless sadness.

For some time, they sat in silence. The church bell clanged for three o’clock. Before long, the light would be gone.

Finally, her mother spoke. ‘What do you want me to do?’ she asked.

Chapter 46

Kilmitten, June 2017

A walk, they’d decided, would be best. There was nowhere else the four could talk without drawing an audience. They’d arranged to meet on the boreen near Toomey’s Hill. Tom was early. There were other things he should have been doing, but it was Sunday, and everyone was entitled to a day of rest. When he’d told Vanessa about his plans, she’d shrugged; her reflex reaction. He’d grown accustomed to long silences punctuated by tart remarks. He didn’t blame her. The truth and everything that followed had been hard for her to accept.