I couldn’t understand why the prospect of revisiting my old tour venues was so frightening to me. It was only – to put it casually, though I felt anything but casual about it – going back to some places, harmless theatres and auditoriums. It would be time-consuming, yes, but I wasn’t touring at the moment. Also, I knew it was the right thing to do. I could see the same glaringly obvious truth Gibbs saw: I was uniquely placed to help the police. How could I refuse? I fought hard with myself inside my head.

Don’t you want to catch Billy Dead Mates?

Of course.

And stop him murdering more people?

Yes.

Then what’s the problem?

I don’t know. Can’t put it into words. I just quite desperately don’t want to do it. I—

‘Kim?’ Gibbs was waiting for my response.

‘I’m sorry. It’s a big ask, that’s all.’

‘I know.’

‘Are you sure it’s necessary? I mean, you don’t know this guy at my gig was Billy. Even if we find the right venue, how’s that going to help you find him?’

‘We’ve been through this. It could be a pointer to him living in the area or having family connections there. We’d be able to make enquiries with some of the other people there that night. Maybe someone saw him who can help us ID him. You’ll need to give a description to a police artist. The sooner we get a sketch of this man to circulate—’

‘I’m happy to do that. Can’t we just do the sketch and forget the historical comedy tour reenactment?’ I wiped beads of sweat from my upper lip.

‘What are you so afraid of?’

It was the same question I’d been asking myself. ‘I don’t fancy another encounter with Scary White Book Man.’

‘Interesting. You’re not scared of Billy Dead Mates the killer, though we have reason to believe you might be on his target list, but you are scared of a man who gave you a white book at a gig last year.’

Yes. ‘I don’t believe they’re the same man.’

‘That was my point,’ said Gibbs. ‘If they aren’t, how come the one you’re more scared of isn’t the one who kills?’

It struck me later that it was the retracing-of-steps aspect of Gibbs’ proposal that terrified me. I am someone who never stays in the same hotel twice; it’s a firm policy of mine. I didn’t want to see where I’d been. I could only cope with dragging My Life So Far around with me everywhere I went on the strict condition that I never had to look in its direction, let alone re-enter it.