I try to shake off the jittery feeling coursing through my veins, the same one that’s been thrumming through my body all day.

“Doing?” I shove a final textbook into my backpack and turn to him. The simple act of looking into his eyes helps calm my racing heart. His face is so open and trusting. “Nothing…Hey, what the hell happened? With Matt? I saw you guys in the office….”

He flushes. “Nothing. It was stupid. Matt’s a dick and I didn’t want to deal with it anymore. I may have punched him, a little.”

“How do you punch someone a little?” I give him a half grin. “Kidding. I’m sure he deserved it. That guy is a jerk.”

“Yeah, no kidding.”

He drums his fingers against the locker. “Anyway…yeah. I don’t know about you, but I had a pretty shitty day. I got a week of detention starting Monday. So I wanted to see if you maybe wanted to come over? Meet my sister? Hang out for a while?” He pauses, and must see the expression that crosses my face, the one that says No fucking way, because he adds, “My mom won’t be there. She never is. She’s at work like all day and night. She even sleeps in her office half the time, since they’re going to trial soon.” He barks a bitter laugh, which I get. When my Dad is working on a film, he lives on set and it’s like he forgets he has a family.

A thousand conflicting emotions hit me when I think about hanging out at Zach’s house. Her house. He thinks I’ve never been there, has no idea I’ve haunted his family in the night. He’s smiling at me with his big, innocent blue eyes, and I want to sink into them, I want some of that innocence for my own, so I say yes. I know it’s a terrible idea, maybe the worst idea, but I say yes anyway, because that’s what I do.

It’ll be on my tombstone, the one right next to Jordan’s. May McGintee: Ignored Her Gut Every Time. By then, Jordan’s will be covered in moss, will be weatherworn, but mine will be fresh and new.

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