It was kind of her to say. She was telling me, sideways on, not to be so hard on myself – wasn’t that just the story of my life?

‘Anyway. We’re so pleased you could be here. Is there a particular aspect of counselling that’s drawn you to learning more?’

‘I think I’m interested in child psychology, maybe, or something to do with helping teenagers.’

I hadn’t realized I wanted that until I said it. It just slipped out, and then hung out there for us both to see. It was as much news to me as it was to her, and we both nodded at this new piece of information.

‘My teenage years were very painful, and it’s taken me until now to understand the impact they had on my life,’ I said. ‘I suppose it would be nice to help any other young ’uns out there who felt like I did.’

‘That’s wonderful,’ she said. She reached out and touched my arm as she spoke, and I understood that was a small signal that she would mingle with some of the others now.

‘Thank you so much for your insights,’ I said. ‘It’s been really great.’

She told me I was welcome, and I spent the bus ride home googling where I could start a foundation course, and exactly how much it would cost me.

This is getting totes awks now, Patrick texted me before bed, and relief flooded through me.

It is! I said. I just want it to be tomorrow night now. A week is too long without you.

Agreed, he sent back, followed by a heart emoji.

43

I was summoned to another meeting with Chen the next morning, in the conference room on the floor above mine. She theatrically pushed an expensive-looking brown envelope across the table to me.

‘What’s this?’ I said, picking it up.

‘It’s your offer,’ she replied, her face impassive. I think she’d switched tack from outright enthusiasm and pushiness to something more sanguine, interpreting my own coolness about Antwerp as a bargaining tactic.

Inside was a three-page document stapled together, and a single loose cover letter. I read it as Chen made a show of checking emails on her phone, as if she couldn’t care less.

Dear Ms Wiig, it said.

We were thrilled to meet with you last week at our Antwerp headquarters. Your reputation as a great mind and extraordinary thinker precedes you, and to hear your thoughts on the manipulations of coding to debug the quantum software, as well further insight into the abstract manipulations of London’s current work in the system modelling and simulation of optical fibre lasers, was exciting and extremely promising.