Mum took a massive breath as she considered how to proceed. She settled on: ‘Patrick, I’m sure you’re a very nice man. But my daughter was engaged to somebody else little over a month ago, and hasn’t had a moment to herself to grieve it all. I’m sure it’s been a wonderful holiday, but I’d be silly to play along with all of this. Have you even thought about where you’re going to live, Annie?’

‘I’ve told her she’s always welcome at mine until she figures it out,’ Patrick offered, and I knew he was trying to be helpful, but I cringed as he said it.

‘Well isn’t that the icing on the cake,’ Mum commented. I didn’t know what to tell her.

We ate quietly after that. I issued a shake of the head to Patrick, letting him know not to push it. As we finished up finally I said, ‘The trip was beautiful, anyway, Mum. And not that anyone has asked but it really helped to put fifteen thousand miles between me and what happened that day. I’m doing fine. I don’t need your permission for moving on. It was naïve of me to think you’d be happy for me. For us.’

Mum stood up to clear the plates. It was remarkable how she could continue to conduct the normal steps of a family meal whilst being so unkind. ‘Just have a little dignity, please,’ she said.

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘It means, Annie, that you just got jilted and already you’ve got yourself a new boyfriend. What do you think people will say about that?’

‘How about,’ I levelled, my face flushing and voice rising, ‘I don’t care? How about I don’t give two hoots what people will say about anything, because I’ve spent my whole life caring and it’s made me miserable?’ I warmed up to my theme, words tumbling out and crashing into each other. ‘What if, actually, nobody is even talking about me anyway because everyone is so concerned with their own lives and their own mistakes? Their own worries? Fuck-ups? What if we all only get one precious life and if we spend it peering through the lace curtains at how everyone else lives we end up missing the chance to make the most of our own?’

Mum said quietly: ‘I don’t want to fight. All I’m asking is that you give this a bit more thought. Okay? Do you really want to leap out of one relationship and into another?’

I half expected Dad to tell her off but he didn’t, he just stared at the table, shaking his head, refusing to get involved any further. Mum took the empty bowls to the kitchen, and Freddie grinned at me across the table, loving how I’d finally given Mum a piece of my mind.