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Back The Lie Save as PDF
Chapters (69)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. 1
  6. 2
  7. 3
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. 8
  13. 9
  14. 10
  15. 11
  16. 12
  17. 13
  18. 14
  19. 15
  20. 16
  21. 17
  22. 18
  23. 19
  24. 20
  25. 21
  26. 22
  27. 23
  28. 24
  29. 25
  30. 26
  31. 27
  32. 28
  33. 29
  34. 30
  35. 31
  36. 32
  37. 33
  38. 34
  39. 35
  40. 36
  41. 37
  42. 38
  43. 39
  44. 40
  45. 41
  46. 42
  47. 43
  48. 44
  49. 45
  50. 46
  51. 47
  52. 48
  53. 49
  54. 50
  55. 51
  56. 52
  57. 53
  58. 54
  59. 55
  60. 56
  61. 57
  62. 58
  63. 59
  64. 60
  65. Acknowledgements
  66. Reading Group Questions
  67. Read More
  68. I
  69. THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING

Finch, as he swung the wooden gate open, gesturing to Grace to go first, stood stock still for a moment and took what felt to him like the biggest breath he had ever taken in his life. He wanted to sing out. In that one sentence, Grace had served notice on the past. He knew nothing would be forgotten – abuse, he was sure, never was – but it was a signal of intent. Michael’s actions would do no further harm.

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59

That Sunday Romy and Leo sat on the harbour wall. It was sunny, not as cold as it was for Grace and Finch in Derbyshire, but there was a nippy wind off the sea, nonetheless. The two barely noticed, however, they were so involved in their conversation.

‘Like a perfect storm,’ Leo said, not for the first time. As if by repeating his father’s rationale often enough, he might finally grasp the actuality of what he’d been told.

‘Perhaps it was,’ she said.

Leo turned to face her, his cheeks pink, his eyes troubled. ‘I don’t know what to do, Mum. Lucy says I should forgive him, but I think she’s got more tools for that as a Christian. And Rex isn’t much help. Dad asked me if I’d tell him, but I don’t think Rex really took it in. Like, he’s too far away for it to have an impact?’ He sighed. ‘God, how will I ever face Dad again? Knowing what he did.’

Silence fell as Romy struggled for an answer. ‘I don’t know, sweetheart. It’s hard to forgive the deed, but the man who did it is not who your father is today. He would never have been brave enough to tell you, if he was.’ She saw Leo considering this.

She had been surprised – and not without a certain respect – that Michael, after claiming he was not yet ready, had taken such a bold leap so soon. She could only guess at the courage it must have taken to confront his son with such a damning confession.

‘Just on a basic level, it’s cringingly embarrassing,’ Leo was saying. ‘He’ll know exactly what I’m thinking, and I won’t know what to say.’

‘Then leave it for a while. Dad will respect your feelings. He won’t be expecting you back, I imagine.’

Her son groaned. ‘It’s just so horrible, Mum. He’s my dad …’ His voice tailed off. ‘I wish to hell I didn’t know. It was my own stupid fault. I should never have kept pushing. I wish we could go back to how it was before. We were getting on better than we ever had in our whole lives.’