Maggie didn’t like deceiving Tom. He didn’t deserve it. But she wasn’t ready to tell anyone about her son. She doubted that she ever would be ready. It meant first facing her own demons and they were well buried with skyscrapers built upon them to ensure they could never rise. Although they did. Now like never before. All the things she did for Tom, all the care she showed him reminded her of what her son had missed out on. Of all the things she should have done. The more time she spent with Tom the more it was dwelling on her mind.

Maggie made two packed lunches – one for Tom and one for her.

‘Here you go,’ she said handing him his as he picked up his schoolbag. He’d been quiet over breakfast and she knew why. ‘Good luck with your exam. It’s the first one today, isn’t it?’

Tom looked a little choked up and he swallowed hard. ‘You remembered.’

‘Of course. Now stay calm and if your mind goes blank do some of the yoga breathing exercises we’ve been doing.’

‘Yeah, that won’t get me beaten up.’

‘I don’t mean in a yoga pose, just sitting at your desk.’

He laughed and looked slightly less glum as he left.

She stuck her lunch into a bag with a flask of tea, hung it over the handlebar and set off on the quad bike. She loved being busy. It gave her such a buzz to have multiple things that needed her attention. Much better than conjuring up tasks for the sake of it.

Despite it being May it was a cloudy day with a keen wind whipping up the hill as she belted along the ridge. Since Tom had come into her life she’d been neglecting the woodland. It wasn’t huge but it was something she cared about and the habitat it provided for local wildlife was essential. Each year she did a bit to keep it under control as it had run wild for many years. She’d found out about woodland management and a while ago had drawn up a five-year plan. It had taken her a couple of days to produce it, which had been a welcome distraction in her life at the time.

Bats, dormice and squirrels all made the woodland their home and many fungi and wildflowers thrived there. The deer and a number of birds were passing visitors who had a vested interest in it. There was a fascinating mix of trees, which puzzled Maggie. She loved the giant oaks that were dotted along the far edge as if they’d been planted as a border. There were other smaller oaks that had taken root naturally but too close to them and she was gradually felling them but it was hard work. There were clumps of elm, plenty of silver birch and a sprinkling of poplar, sycamore and hazel.