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Chapters (36)
  1. The Last Dragonslayer
  2. Copyright
  3. Dedication
  4. Practical Magic
  5. Tiger Prawns
  6. Zambini Towers
  7. About the Mystical Arts
  8. The Magiclysm
  9. Mother Zenobia
  10. The Dragon Question
  11. Patrick and the Childcatcher
  12. Norton and Villiers
  13. Mutiny
  14. William of Anorak
  15. Brian Spalding – Last Dragonslayer
  16. The Dragonlands
  17. Maltcassion
  18. Gordon van Gordon
  19. The Truth about Mr Zambini
  20. Big Magic
  21. His Majesty King Snodd IV
  22. Yogi Baird
  23. Foundling Trouble
  24. The Duke of Brecon
  25. Dragon Attack
  26. Mr Hawker
  27. Maltcassion again
  28. Sir Matt Grifflon
  29. Escape from Zambini Towers
  30. Back to the Dragonlands
  31. Noon
  32. Anger
  33. The New Order
  34. The End of the Story
  35. About the Author
  36. Also by Jasper Fforde

I noticed that several excavators were starting to build large defensive ditches for the expected invasion on Sunday afternoon. It would be a waste of time. Landships would pass over them as if they were not there. Brecon had nothing compared to the military might of King Snodd.

‘It will be bows and arrows against the lightning,’ I told him.

‘I know,’ replied Brecon sadly, ‘my artillery will barely dent the landships. But we will fight to maintain our freedom. I will be here, next to my men, defending my beloved country to the last shot in my revolver, and the final breath in my body.’

‘I wish you luck, Sire.’

He thanked me but said nothing. He had a lot of work to do. I returned to the Dragonlands deep in thought. Right now, I couldn’t see anything but bad news in every direction. And it suddenly struck me that everyone kept forgetting about Maltcassion himself, even though he was at the heart of everything that was happening. And the fact remained that the pre-cogs had spoken of a Dragon death at the hand of a Dragonslayer. Destiny had me killing Maltcassion at noon on Sunday. But the fact of the matter was, if Maltcassion didn’t transgress the Dragonpact, I didn’t have to.

I slipped back to Zambini Towers to tell Tiger what had happened. More sorcerers and magicians had arrived, and a party seemed to be going on. All the retired magicians of the lands were making their way to the small kingdom, following an instinct to lend whatever power they had to the Big Magic.

Dragon Attack

Dragon Attack

I was awakened by Gordon van Gordon, who was pulling on my sleeve and urging me to wakefulness. I had been dreaming of Dragons again, but not all the dreams were good ones. Maltcassion had been looking at me with a grim expression, explaining what it meant to him to be a Dragon, but I hadn’t really been listening and missed something important, which annoyed me.

‘What’s that noise?’ I asked.

‘It’s the red phone.’

‘I don’t have a red phone. And what are you doing in Zambini Towers?’

‘We’re not in Zambini Towers.’

He was right. I was in the Dragonstation. I hurried downstairs. The red phone was kept under a glass dome a little like a sandwich cover just next to the sword Exhorbitus, and the phone was wailing slowly to itself. If a Dragon had done something wrong, then this was how a Dragonslayer would know about it. With shaking hand I picked up the receiver and listened intently. The news was not what I had wanted to hear.