This felt like a low blow. I looked away and stared at the window. It was dark outside but light glowed from the streetlamp outside the house.

She continued in a low voice. ‘When we saw the local paper piece asking whether anyone knew him, I almost died from the shock that he was still alive. Mum pretended to be a journalist and called for updates, so we found out, just a few days ago, that he had died.’

‘Murder, then,’ I murmured, and she shot me a defiant look.

‘As I am being totally honest with you,’ she said, ‘I was relieved to hear this. I’m sorry if that makes you think badly of me. But you don’t know what it is like to feel what I felt, that this man was going to rape and kill me.’

There was a long silence before Anya spoke again.

‘I love you, Ell. Please never forget that. I did what I thought was right, but I made mistakes. I don’t think I deserve to go to prison for them though, do you?’

ELLIOTT

My head had started to ache at some point in the last ten minutes. Maybe it was the stuffiness of that room. I only noticed now that the windows were tightly shut, despite the mildness of the day. Maybe it was shock at what I had just heard.

Anya was sitting again now, leaning forwards, so her head was on her knees, her arms wrapped around her legs. She was rocking a little bit.

I couldn’t seem to work through everything I was feeling.

My skin prickled with goose pimples and the flat suddenly felt very cold. I pictured Anya running from that man, in blind terror for her life, and squeezed my hands into fists, before jumping up and pacing the room. The toe of my trainer caught the edge of the Chinese rug and I tripped, almost flying face first into the mantelpiece. Adrenaline sparked up my spine and I was breathing heavily as I steadied myself.

‘Are you alright?’ she said. ‘That rug’s a death trap. I’m always telling Mum and Dad it needs to go.’

I turned to look at her, incredulous at her easy tone. There were probably all sorts of quirks to this, the secret Ryland family flat. Maybe some rattly pipes, or a tap that didn’t quite turn off. I wouldn’t know, would I?

‘So you’ve been here? Hiding away from work? From me?’

Her cheeks darkened as she looked up at me and I could see annoyance there.

I knew I was focusing on all the wrong things here. But I couldn’t seem to get my derailed emotions onto the correct track.