‘It was with Michael’s things,’ I said. Fear twisted through me about what was coming. But it wasn’t for what she might say. It was for what she might leave out.

‘Please don’t lie to me,’ I blurted, ‘not again.’

She began to knead her fist in under her ribs.

‘Can you get me some water?’ she said in a flat voice. ‘I feel a bit sick again.’

Silently, I left the room and poured water from the tap into a glass. My hand was shaking a little.

When I came back in, she was still wearing her coat. Staring down at the carpet, very still, her hands neatly folded in her lap, she looked entirely self-contained. Not for the first time, I had the dizzying sensation that, while I was familiar with the touch, smell, taste, sound, and sight of Anya, what was inside her mind was sometimes unknowable to me.

I turned on the other lamps and sat down opposite her in the chair.

Outside a car went past, rap pumping from the windows, then all we could hear was the hum of the freezer in the kitchen.

When I spoke, my voice seemed too loud for the room.

‘So this Liam. Tell me more about him.’

I was aware this wasn’t exactly the most important question right now but I felt the need to circle around whatever was contained in that cutting. Somehow, I knew Liam was central to all this and that she had been holding back before.

‘What do you want to know?’ she said and met my eyes. I worked hard to keep my expression neutral.

‘Don’t bullshit me,’ I said, quietly. ‘Just tell me all of it.’

‘God,’ she said with a heavy, drawn-out sigh. ‘It’s such a weird … horrible story. I honestly wanted to just forget that period of my life.’

She searched my face for a response but I stayed silent. I needed her to vomit this out in one go now. I was so tired of being in the dark.

‘I wasn’t lying when I said how I met Liam,’ she said, her fingers twiddling the silky tassel on the cushion next to her. ‘He sold me drugs at a club. I did a lot of drugs then, Ell, more than you think.’

When no response came, she continued.

‘We started hanging out a bit,’ she said. ‘To be honest, it was refreshing to be with someone who wasn’t in my college. You’ve no idea how cliquey and claustrophobic Cambridge can be. You hang out with the same crowd … hear the same sort of voices. Liam lived on an estate. I didn’t, then, know anyone who’d come from a council estate.’