At that moment the dwarfs were happily sharing Shan and Gath’s new variation on Brew 19, helped by some frozen fruit salvaged from Dan’s van. Dan, who was resigned to the fact that his ice-cream business was unlikely to recover in the current circumstances owing to the consumption of all his ice cream and most of his chocolate, had joined in the tasting, and was now a little tipsy. Even Constable Peel had consented to a “small one,” with Sergeant Rowan’s permission, and the sergeant had found some unexpected common ground with Jolly, who had explained to him that the dwarfs’ criminal behavior was all society’s fault. Sergeant Rowan also believed this was true, mainly because society hadn’t found a way to lock them up and throw away the key.

Angry, meanwhile, was demonstrating to Constable Peel the intricacies of pickpocketing, although this was less out of a desire to share hidden knowledge with the policeman than because Constable Peel had caught Angry trying to steal his handcuffs.

“I can’t help it,” Angry was explaining in what might almost have been a sincere manner. “I was just born this way. My mum says she brought me home from the hospital and found a stethoscope and two thermometers in my diaper. I can find a way to steal anything, me. It’s a gift. Sort of.”

“I stole something once,” said Constable Peel suddenly.

Angry, along with Dozy and Mumbles, who had been listening to the conversation, looked taken aback.

“Really?” said Dozy.

Constable Peel nodded slowly. His cheeks burned with shame, and a little Brew 19 that had splashed on his skin had begun to irritate it.

“I was four,” he said. “I was sitting next to Briony Andrews in kindergarten. We always got two cookies at break, and I’d finished mine, but she had one left. So—”

Constable Peel covered his eyes with one hand and choked back a sob. Angry patted him on the back and tried not to laugh.

“Let it out,” he said. “Confession is good for the soul.”

Somehow, Constable Peel found the strength to go on.

“So—”

“I can see where this is going,” said Dozy.

“Ungbit,” said Mumbles.

“Absolutely,” said Dozy. “Briony Andrews is about to be one hundred percent down in the cookie department.”

“So—”

“Very tense, this,” said Angry.

“I stole her cookie!” concluded Constable Peel.

“No!” said Dozy, almost managing to sound surprised.

“Go on with you,” said Angry, not managing to sound surprised at all.

“Hardened criminal, you were,” said Jolly, joining in the fun. “Stealing a little girl’s cookie? That’s low, that is.”

“Devious,” said Dozy.

“Underhanded,” said Angry.

“Sneaky,” said Jolly.

“I know, I know,” said Constable Peel. “And it gets worse: I pretended she’d lost it. I even helped to organize the search party.”