David Do you mean somebody who –?

Richard Shouldn’t be. That could be well worth a flutter.

Sally emerges with a tray of tea things. She spreads a cloth on the grass. David helps her.

We’re not going to be fed again, are we?

David Would you prefer a drink, Richard?

Richard No, no. (to Sally) What have you got for us?

Sally Tea, Sir.

Richard Good!

Sally And sandwiches.

Richard Splendid!

Sally And shortbread.

Richard I’m a slave to shortbread. (to David) She’s out to subvert me.

Sally I’m what, Sir?

David Thank you, Sally. That’s fine.

Richard Your father has dragooned some specimens for me?

David He did say something about –

Richard Small sampling will suffice. Our major work is on the Aran Islands. You’ve been there?

David Never. (to Sally) These look good (sandwiches).

Sally Cold beef. Specially for you.

David You’re a dote.

Richard We’re heading there this evening. Why don’t you come with us?

David I’d like to, Richard. But Father and I have to thin out those trees.

Richard An awesome place inhabited by a truly remarkable tribe. You must see them. Handsome, wild, courteous, vengeful.

David Why vengeful?

Richard (whispers) Irish.

David (laughs) Richard!

Richard Extraordinarily long faces and black eyes. And of course addicted to the most extravagant superstitions.

David Richard!

Richard A primeval people really. Sally, isn’t it?

Sally Sally it is, Sir.

Richard You ministered to us magnificently last night, Sally.

Sally You enjoyed yourself, Sir?

Richard A little too well, perhaps?

Sally You, Sir? Never!

Richard You have an artful one there, David.

David Are you artful, Sally?

Sally What do you mean by that?

Richard See! Bred in the bone. Excellent (shortbread). Oh, yes: they were the original Firbolgs, the Aran people, according to Celtic tradition; and for thousands of years untouched by outside influences. Until Cromwell put a garrison of our men there and of course they were married with the natives and within a couple of generations the Firbolg integrity was vitiated. Well done!

This to Christopher and Perkins, who emerge with a table and chairs, a box of instruments and a camera.

Christopher Where do you want this (table), cousin?

Richard Just place it there. Thank you. (to Perkins) Mind artful Sally’s dishes. And a chair there and there. Careful with that camera, Perkins.

Perkins Careful, Sir.

Richard For God’s sake, man, give it to me.

David I’ll take it.

Richard Thank you, David. Very special tool, that.

We’ve taken hundreds of photographs of the Aran tribe and everybody gets a picture of himself as a reward. Photographs are our glass beads.

David Isn’t that a little crude?

Christopher Richard crude? Never!

Richard I promise you that the natives are thrilled by them. Send them as special trophies to their relatives in America. (to Perkins) Instrument box?

Perkins Instrument box, Sir.

Richard Well, place it on the table, man.

Perkins On the table, Sir.

Richard Now, Chris, all that’s missing are our specimens. How many do you expect?