Viper. Lachlan’s war name.

“And yet,” Alex continued with a shrug. “Your mother saw something in him.”

“And you did as well?”

He gave her another shrug. “Maybe at times. It was complicated.”

Joan suspected that was the biggest understatement of the day. Not for the first time she wondered what had happened to make him leave.

They were quiet for a while, watching the hawks dive and soar, from their seat on the old wall. She might not like the birds up close, but they were absolutely beautiful to watch. “Why did you not say anything about seeing me at Roxburgh before?” Alex asked.

She could ask him the same. “I wasn’t sure, and I didn’t want to make things any more difficult for you.”

He gave her a wry smile. “So I see you’ve heard that my loyalties are currently suspect?”

“My cousin mentioned something about your helping to uncover the spy to clear you from suspicion.”

He shook his head, not without some disgust. “It’s bloody ironic, isn’t it? I turned traitor to one side only to be thought a traitor by the other. Everywhere I go, it’s suspicion.”

She’d never thought about it that way, but as a baron with lands on both sides of the border he didn’t really have a side—he was caught in the middle. Was that it? She couldn’t hold back the questions any longer, though part of her feared the answer. Alex’s betrayal of Bruce and the Guard was the only thing keeping her heart at bay. It was easier not to know—it kept a wall between them. And yet she could no longer stop herself from asking, “Why did you do it, Alex? What made you decide to leave the Scots to fight for the English?”

There was an almost imperceptible stiffening of his shoulders. “There are many people who have changed allegiance throughout this war. It is hardly unusual.”

He was avoiding the question. “But those men aren’t you.”

“What do you mean?”

“You live and breathe honor and integrity.”

He smiled, his teeth a white flash against his already sun-darkened skin. “You make me sound like some kind of paragon, which I assure you I am not.”

“Maybe so, but those things are important to you.”

He gave her a wry smile. “And a man who betrays his compatriots cannot be honorable and have integrity, is that it?” She didn’t say anything. “Yet that is why I left.”

It was clear she didn’t understand, and he seemed to be weighing whether to say more. Perhaps her patience and silence helped to convince him. “Do you know how to swim?”

The question caught her off guard. She blinked and nodded.