When I get back to Micha’s house, Micha, Ethan, and my brother are still gone, looking for tuxes to rent at the last minute, even though I suggested they all just wear black button-down shirts. As Lila, Caroline, and Micha’s mom get situated in the kitchen, ready to tie more ribbon and put candles in the glass jars they bought, I decide that I need to go visit the cemetery. So I grab my sketchpad and a pencil and bundle up in my coat, gloves, and boots.

When I return to the kitchen, Micha’s mom turns around from the sink and notices my outdoor attire. “Ella, where are you headed?” she asks, scrubbing down a plate with a sponge as she holds it under running water.

I tuck my sketchpad under my arm. “I need to go somewhere.”

She looks out the window at the cloudy sky and then at the microwave where the time blinks 4:02. “But it’s getting dark and colder.”

“I won’t be gone for too long,” I assure her, walking toward the back door.

Lila gives me a strange look from the kitchen table as she loops some ribbon into a bow. “Do you want company?”

They look at me as I open the back door and let the winter air inside. “No. There’s something I have to do.” I wave at them. “I’ll be back soon. I promise.” Before any of them can argue, I step outside and shut the door. Heading down the driveway, I pull the top of my jacket over my mouth and nose as the frosty air bites at my skin.

At the end of the driveway, I veer to the right and walk down the sidewalk toward the cemetery, keeping a steady pace, knowing that I’m not going to be able to endure the icy air for very long. By the time I reach the cemetery, my fingers are numb, but I shake off the cold as I sit down in the snow in front of her headstone. There’s a leafless tree just behind it and icicles dangle from the bare branches. The iron gate that borders the cemetery is frosted with snow that also covers the tops of some of the headstones.