His voice is careful, when he continues. “It’s this,” he says. I look up because his voice is so serious, and so are his eyes. “I’ve figured out that I’m not attracted to someone unless I care about them. And I don’t want to have sex with anyone unless I like them very much. I knew that in theory. But when I realized how much I liked you—” He swallows. “How much I wanted to be with you. I was overwhelmed.”

My hummingbird heart is in my throat, and I try to swallow it down.

“I wish you had just said that,” I say in a croaky voice. “At the start. Before we got naked.” I wave the hand he’s not holding. “Anytime before! Especially if this is all new for you! I want to know that! I need to know that!”

“I didn’t know what to say,” he says.

“Anything! You should have said anything! You could have tried. You could have drawn me a picture. Or brought me a library book. Or written it on a cake! Because listen, Jack, that happened instead, and I spent a lot of time trying to remember I didn’t care about other people’s opinions about my body, thinking you were horrified by it. And I didn’t want to talk to you and hear you say yep, that’s exactly what it is, sorry about that. And it sucked.”

He’s shaking his head. “Oh no. Oh no, no, Addie. You are so gorgeous. And so sexy. And so confident. Have I said that? I want to keep telling you that. And you’re so not horrifying.”

“I know,” I say.

He laughs at that, pleased, and I am smiling back at him.

“Thank you for telling me,” I say. “I’m sorry it was hard to tell me sooner. I do get it.”

“I know,” he says. He moves like he’s going to reach for my other hand, but pulls back. “You had a favor to ask me,” he guesses. “And I want to say yes.”

“Can I still kiss you?” I blurt. Because his hair is rumpled and his face is all relief that we finally talked, and because I was sad when he pulled back just now. Because I want to. Because I like him. “That’s not the favor, though,” I add hastily, when his eyes get big.

“Please,” he says, and I don’t even think he heard my joke, so I slip my arms around his neck, laugh against his mouth when he pulls me hard against him, almost frantic as he kisses me, and I kiss him back.

“Is it okay that I like you a lot?” he says, and I nod. “Is it okay if this is slow?”

“Of course,” I say, and I shiver when he kisses my neck.

“Is it okay if I tell you all the things I like about your body?”