She nodded. “You’re going to have to. He’ll come around once he sees you like we do, and, quite frankly, you two are the least of my concerns right now.”

The tension was getting to her, and I saw that her chest was rising and falling quickly, and that her hands were shaky as she tied the last bow. She wasn’t here anymore; she was back in Abicrest, in the middle of the attack. “Do you want to talk about it?”

She shook her head. “Not yet.”

“Well, if you ever decide you’re ready . . .”

“I would tell you before anyone else. The others wouldn’t understand, and Mother couldn’t take it. Only not yet.”

I took her hands, steadying them in my own. “That’s fine. We’ll make this right, Scarlet. Somehow, we’ll figure this out.”

She nodded, taking a few steadying breaths. She couldn’t hide everything, but she wasn’t prepared to show just how deeply this was hurting her, either. I felt privileged in a way, that she lowered her shields to me.

“I’m ready now,” she said. “Let’s go.” We headed downstairs, arms laced. “I was thinking I might want to move to the country, in the north, far away from everything.”

“I don’t blame you. After the bustle of court life, something quiet might be nice. You know, once we overthrow a kingdom and dole out justice and all,” I teased.

She smirked. “I’ll find a house and keep a room especially for you, just in case you do get married and want somewhere to run when your husband is a pain.”

I giggled and held her arm a little tighter. “Perhaps we’ll just grow into old maids.”

“With lots of goats,” she suggested.

“I like goats.”

“Then it’s settled.”

By the time we got to the dining room, Mother was already seated, as was Lord Northcott. They had been speaking in whispers, but looked up and smiled brightly when they saw us come in.

“Good morning, girls,” Lord Northcott greeted us happily. “You look well rested.”

“Then we have you fooled,” Scarlet joked.

I’d expected Etan to already be there, but he must have had errands or something, because he walked into the room seconds after us.

He greeted his father and took the seat across from me, refusing to give me any space at all.

Pottage, cheeses, and bread were on the table. After Scarlet began spooning some onto her plate, I did the same. A maid poured some ale into Etan’s and Scarlet’s cups. I held mine up so I could get some as well. I couldn’t tell if she didn’t see me or ignored me.

I set my cup back down. Etan watched the whole thing unfold, and for some reason, him seeing me being snubbed was worse than the actual event itself, and I could feel myself blushing. I lowered my eyes and ate in silence.

“Ah! What a joy to see a full table!” Lady Northcott swung into the room, injecting the atmosphere with infectious bliss. I watched as she walked around the table to kiss her husband on his cheek and her son on his forehead. Etan didn’t pull away or look irritated as he usually did but seemed to be thankful for the brief touch. I couldn’t help but smile, aching a bit that my mother never did such a thing for me.