She told me later, after I was allowed to go riding in her car, that she was always afraid somebody would tell my grandparents some wild tale about her.

But she also told me that when she was in her teens, her mother took a turn to her. The same bed that she had nursed her in. Her mother, convinced that Rohn would never find a lover, took her in. This time, instead of opening her blouse to nurse Rohn, she opened her legs to her. Anytime she wanted it, she said.

I was in love with Rohn by then. I figured that she had to like me more than most, else she would never have told me those things. On the other hand, they could all have been lies.

One Sunday she came by in her ’56 Chevy; it was green and white and shiny.

I ran out to the car and leaned on the window. “Hi.”

She smiled. “I just came by to tell you how pretty you are.” Which she knew would make me grin.

“Can you go for a ride?” she asked.

I shook my head. “I don’t think so.”

“Ask.”

So I ran back in and asked, and was told no, I couldn’t go for a ride in anybody’s car, and what was I wanting to go for a ride with Miss Rohn for anyhow?

I ran back out and told her. Her smile changed to somewhere between sad and disgusted, and she nodded. “Oh, well.” Then she looked at me and winked. “Maybe some other time, okay?”

“Yeah maybe.”

“You take care, y’hear?”

“All right.”

Never occurred to me to say ma’am to her, ever.

I was up at the store to get some things for Grandma. It was getting near to evening. Rohn’s car was there.

I’d never felt this way about a real person before. I felt about her like I only felt about fantasy movie stars.

She watched me approach the car. She was sitting with her back to the door, one leg up and her arm stretched across the back of the seat. She half smiled.

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

I explained about my errand; I’m not sure what there was to explain. She looked at me quietly. I think that she knew what she was doing. Driving me insane. So I took my leave and went inside.

When I came out, she offered me a ride home. Her eyes darted toward the store and then she opened the car door. She set my groceries in the back.

We pulled out of the station. Dark was falling and the bright Esso sign came on. We sped past my turn-off road. I sighed in relief.