Then she woke properly and reality hit. She stiffened, sat up, accidentally knocking her husband’s face with her elbow in her haste. She heard Devan’s exclamation, then words began pouring, uncontrolled, from her mouth in the dark bedroom, as if disgorged from another person’s throat. The sentences were sharp, staccato bursts, fired with unrelenting clarity. There could be no doubt about what she was saying.

When she had finished there was dead silence. Then the rustle of Devan sitting up, turning on the bedside light. The sudden illumination made her cower and hide her face.

‘What did you just say?’ Devan’s voice was barely above a whisper.

Steeling herself, she turned to him. His dark eyes looked bewildered. She took a deep breath. ‘I’m so sorry,’ she said, almost laughing at the gross inadequacy of her words. Her husband was still staring blankly at her. She wondered if he had really grasped what she’d said. But she wasn’t going to repeat it. She waited, hugging her bent knees, her body trembling. She wanted to get up, to move around and dispel the shaking in her limbs. But she felt anchored beside Devan, like a child to an angry parent.

‘Christ,’ Devan said, his voice low.

‘I’m sorry,’ she repeated vainly.

‘Wait. Let me get this clear.’ His tone had hardened. ‘You’ve been having an affair with Jed … all summer.’

She didn’t respond. There was nothing more she could add.

He wrenched her round to face him. Now, his eyes were blazing. ‘You and Jed had sex? You fucked him?’

Devan seldom used that word. Connie winced to hear it on his lips.

‘Why? Why would you do something like that?’

He was gripping her arms, his head inches from hers. She tried not to flinch, tried to be steady in face of his fury.

‘Tell me, Connie. For God’s sake, tell me.’ He shook her, a short, sharp jerk like she’d give a wet sheet. She was limp in his grasp.

Taking a deep breath, she said, ‘Nothing I can say excuses what happened.’

His grip slackened, but his voice was as cold as steel. ‘I want to know why. Tell me.’

‘I don’t know, I really don’t … Our marriage was in a mess … but I honestly never intended it to happen.’ She knew she sounded weak and unconvincing.

He sneered, letting his hands fall. ‘He was just so irresistible?’

‘I can’t explain, Devan.’

Her husband jumped out of bed and stood in his T-shirt and pyjama bottoms, glaring down at her with a stunned look on his face. She saw tears in his eyes. He put up a hand and wiped them away with his fingers. ‘Maybe things weren’t so great between us but God, Connie, I don’t understand how you could go that far.’

She couldn’t repeat ‘sorry’ again, so she gritted her teeth and stayed silent.