‘Didn’t realise Sasha was with you, that’s nice. Who are the others?’

I hesitate, unsure what to say.

‘I see.’ Dom’s voice loses a bit of its enthusiasm. ‘So that’s not fizzled out then. I was hoping you might be calling to say it was all over and you’re ready for me to hit the button on moving down.’

‘I… erm…’ I cringe, annoyed at myself as I realise I’m about to ruin Dom’s night out with his friends. ‘Actually, maybe it can wait.’

‘Hey, only joking, kitten. You know that. It’s been so great chatting with you the last couple of weeks. Can’t blame a guy for being a bit impatient, eh?’

‘No, I guess not.’ I kick lightly at a bollard in discomfort, suddenly feeling the chill in the air. ‘Look, Dom. I am phoning about us, but I’m afraid it’s not to tell you what you want to hear.’

‘Ah.’

Taking a deep breath, I blurt it all out. ‘Dom, I’m so sorry. I really am. It’s just… I’ve found a new life here and it’s changed me more than I realised. I’m just not sure that we’re right for each other any more.’

‘You mean you like this other guy better.’

‘What? No. It’s not that simple. Tonight, when I was on stage, it just—’

‘What do you mean you were “on stage”?’

I give myself a mental kick – I hadn’t mentioned the band to Dom before now, due to it being Matt-related. ‘I’ve joined a band, as their lead singer. They’re Matt’s friends and I had my first gig with them tonight. It was amazing. I felt so alive and it just made me realise that this change I’ve made in my life has been for a reason.’

‘Right.’ Dom clears his throat. ‘I thought the reason was your MS, Lex.’

‘It was. But now, my illness aside, this is the life I should be living.’

‘You mean you’re on a high after your gig.’

‘Well, yes, but that’s not all it is.’

There’s a short silence at the end of the line. ‘Lex, have you really thought this through? Things are going great for you right now. But will that last? Isn’t this just another case of denial? How can you expect to sustain that lifestyle?’

I frown at my phone. ‘What… what do you mean?’

‘I mean, what happens to your place in the band when you relapse? Do they know about your situation? Does Matt even know about it? I’m guessing not. And when he finds out, do you think he’s just going to shrug and say it doesn’t matter?’

‘I… it’ll be fine.’

‘That’s your answer? Have you thought this through or are you just ignoring it? Because you can’t, Lex. No matter how much you want to. Joining a band on top of your aspirations at work – it’s all admirable. But it would be a lot for a healthy person, never mind someone with your condition.’

I feel myself smart with annoyance. But unfortunately, Dom has sliced open a deep vulnerability, which snuffs out any ability to face up to him.