“No,” she says to me, coming over and sitting next to me, holding my hand in hers. My head falls to her shoulder. “Jacob called.”

“I love him,” I say softly.

“I know, baby,” she says, and I look at her and see she has her own tears running down her face. Leaning back, she lets go of my hand to put her arm around my shoulder, and I lie down with my head in her lap. She plays with my hair as she swings us.

“Tomorrow,” I say softly, my eyes getting heavy. “Tomorrow I’ll work on not loving him.”

Chapter Seventeen

Jacob

She stood there in front of me, each word stabbing me in the chest. Each time, I wanted to tell her the biggest secret of my life. Each time, I wanted to take her in my arms. Yet each time, the lie stopped me.

The kiss was everything that I remember but even better. I haven’t kissed anyone in eight years. I haven’t touched anyone in eight years. I haven’t because no one could measure up to her.

“It is what it is, Jacob.” Her voice came out like there was nothing left inside her. The fight was gone. “Please don’t follow me.” She turns and walks away from me, and I’m about to take a step toward her when she stops and turns around and looks at me. “For eight years, I’ve thought of this, right here. I thought that you could give me answers. I thought you could tell me, but now I know it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters because in the end you chose her.” She shrugs, and I want to fucking shout that it’s not true. That I would never do anything to hurt her. “It would have been magical,” she tells me. “It would have been everything that I’ve ever dreamed up.”

“What would?” I ask, and now my own tears start to come.

“Our life,” she whispers and walks away from me. My legs actually give out on me, and I fall to my knees. I take out my phone and call the number I will always remember.

“Hello,” Charlotte says, answering the phone after one ring.

“Hey, it’s Jacob,” I say, my voice breaking.

“What happened?” she asks me, frantically, and I hear the covers rustle.

“I …” I start, “Kallie is on her way home.”

“Okay,” she says in a whisper.

“I’m going to make sure she gets there okay, but I won’t be with her.”

“I’ll be watching,” she says. Just as I’m about to hang up the phone, I hear, “Thank you, Jacob.”

Putting the phone in my pocket, I climb to my feet slowly and follow her back to her house. Never once getting close enough for her to know I’m there. The twigs cracking under her shoes is the only sound I hear.